Toy Chest Tuesday! Sour Grapes

Hello toy lovers! I have a new edition of Toy Chest Tuesday ready to go! Today we will be looking back on toys that smelled. More specifically from Strawberry Shortcake. Something strange has occured throughout Strawberry Shortcake's various incarnations and reboots. She hasn't really faced many enemies. Unless you count diabetes. I mean the only time that Shortcake and her friends had any real threats were from the original toyline. The Peculiar Purple Pie Man and Sour Grapes were the only villians to ever live in Strawberry Land. The Peculiar Purple Pie Man was an old guy that looked like a cross between Dr. Wiley and Luigi. Sour Grapes was his old partner in crime and always kind've reminded me of Ms. Havisham.

So here's the thing, old cranky people do not really make great enemies to kids that smell like fruit. Right? I don't see the threat. Unless the old cranky people are planning on baking Shortcake's friends into a dessert, I never understood why these folks were bad. In fact I always loved Sour Grapes. She smelled like grapes and her hair was purple with electric blue streaks. How could she not be cool?

I am going to show you pictures of my Sour Grapes mint in box. The one I had as a kid is at the bottom of a bin somewhere in my archival room. I have had a hard time trying to get everything out to display perfectly.

So there ya go. Sour Grapes. I could see how she might be somewhat frightening to the fruity kids of Strawberry Land. She has a pet snake wrapped around her shoulders, way before Britney Spears even knew what a snake was. The snakes name is Dregs. Her face also has those "I'm in a state of surprise" eye brows. Let's look closer...

I mean I love her. She has this tacky hot pink eye shadow on, and earrings that are clusters of grapes. She is like a crazy old grape lady. This is how I envision myself when I am Sour Grape's age. Drawn on eye brows, tacky hot pink eye shadow that I know I shouldn't be wearing. Finding ways to scare children that smell like baked goods. Wearing a live reptile for a stole. I will be the epitome of aging gracefully.

The side box explains that Sour Grapes' gown can be removed for dressing fun. I'm not sure but I think she'd slap someone for wanting to dress her up in anything other than a grape maxi dress. It also mentions that Dregs can be draped over her shoulders. Well at least she is not cruel to animals. This broad could be killing animals and wearing their furs like Cruella. No, she is more hardcore than that. She keeps the snake alive and wears him for fashion. Lady Gaga where are you? You've got your next performance outfit ready to go. Forget a meat dress, tape some real animals to you and see what happens!

Here is the back of the box. I don't know what Sour Grapes is trying to do with her arms, but she looks like she is stumbling through that broken down gate. I can't help but think, maybe the reason she loves grapes so much is that she uses the grapes to make her own special moonshine wine? Wouldn't that be great if Sour Grapes was really some wino? That would explain so much. The pet snake, the tacky make up. It all would make so much sense! Now all I need is a Robot Chicken episode to tackle Sour Grapes and her drinking ways. It would be awesome!

Anyways, that is it for this week of Toy Chest Tuesday! If all goes according to the postal service, next week should be a really cool Toy Chest Tuesday! I'm thinking something golden. And tricky...

Why aren't you watching?! New Fall TV!

Hi dear readers! Let's talk about TV today. Fall is a special time of year for my television. The networks and cable stations all rally together and throw a ton of new shows my way. It can be hard for a girl to keep up. So with a few weeks until the return of the Walking Dead and premier of Once Upon a Time, I thought it'd be nice to look at some of the offerings that are already airing. Or rather, the ones I am watching. With soaps and all, I can't watch everything people!

New Girl (Fox)- I am on the fence with this new show that sees Zooey Deschanel play a really awkard nerd girl who moves in with three really awkward-in-their-own-way guys after she suffers a break up. I love Zooey, she is really funny and always looks so pretty. However her humor with the show can be a bit much. I have only seen two episodes so far, and there are times where the nerd girl humor is slapped on a bit thick. I don't know exactly how to explain it, but with nerdy quirky humor you have to be careful. The character can become too cartoonish and silly. The three guys are pretty funny though too. In fact the guys have a "douche bag jar." Whenever a roommate says or does something "douchey" they have to put money in the douche bag jar. I love it! I want to carry a small douche bag coin purse and pull it out whenever I see some douchey stuff go down. I will be rich! (I'll have a new car in no time!) Also the storyline makes me wonder if at some point a couple or all three of the guys are going to end up falling for the "new girl" and she will be forced to choose. I say give the show a shot though, it isn't that bad.

2 Broke Girls (CBS)- Love this show. Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs are just pure comic goodness. I just love this show! The premise is simple enough, Kat and Beth become an unlikely pair as they end up working and living together. The writing and acting are both fantastic. The show makes fun of everything and has a real wicked sense of humor going with it. If there is one comedy show that must be added to your DVR list, it has to be 2 Broke Girls.

Suburgatory (ABC)- This is a promising show. I have only seen one episode, but it was cute and funny. Basically the show is a satire of suburban life. Sometimes satire can be awful and just eye rollingly unoriginal. However this show adds some heart to it so it is still engaging without swallowing itself up. Plus the actor who plays the dad (Jeremy Sisto) is Elton from Clueless! That is enough to make me want to watch! Plus Cheryl Hines plays a suburban mom that is just hilarious.

Dirty Soap (E!)- Ok I do not usually follow a lot of reality shows. I tend to prefer my scripted stories. Dirty Soap though is the perfect reality show for me to jump on board with. This show follows a group of soap stars as the deal with their lives and relationships. It is amazing. First of all some of the stars are from soaps I watch, so you just know I will be hooked. I always roll my eyes when non-soap people groan, "Oh soap actors can't act." That is total bull crap. Watch this show, you will see. Farah Fath and John-Paul Lavosier are nothing like their characters on One Life to Live. John-Paul seems really geeky and cool in real life, unlike his character Rex who is kinda goofy but was also a huge player. And Farah seems like a lot of fun in real life. Regardless if you love soaps or not, this is a really good show. The first episode has a scene with the son of a soap actor totally pounding his fist on the family dog after the dog bit him. It was so funny! Not because the kid got bit, that is never good. But that little kid was ready to go after that dog! This show is out of control, DVR it now!

Pan Am (ABC)- There was definitely a trend this Fall TV season with period dramas. Especially period dramas taking place in the '60s similar to Mad Men. The big issue I had would be, do I watch Pan Am or the Playboy Club? I gave both a chance but Pan Am won hands down. Why? The Playboy Club just could not interest me. I didn't really care about what the characters were going through. The show reminded me of Dick Tracy, except without the cool colorful mob guys with facial deformities. Whereas Pan Am has really been a good show so far. I cared about the characters after the first episode, which is always a good thing. It is also a visually great movie. I feel like if there were to be a cross over between Mad Men and Pan Am, it would flow well and look good. I don't see that with the Playboy Club and Mad Men. I even like the whole spy storyline on Pan Am. I wasn't sure how I'd like that, but it is working for me.

Charlie's Angels (ABC)- Ok so I grew up watching reruns of the original Charlie's Angels and it was always fun and campy. I also loved the movies that came out recently. I mean when Demi Moore walked out of the ocean in Full Throttle all I could think was, "I pray I look as good as her when I am her age." So it was only natural that I would give the new Charlie's Angels a try. I have to say, it isn't bad. I do like it.  However, I do see myself getting bored with the show. Each episode is like a repeat. The Angels have a case to solve and through some action and glamorous scenes the case is eventually solved. I like cliffhangers. And serial story telling! I can't help it. So the jury is still out with this reboot. I will keep watching for now though.

Ringer (CW)- My favorite new show of the Fall season! Here is why: Sarah Michelle Gellar. I loved her on All My Children and of course followed her to Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She is great, and Ringer is such a fun show. There is so much drama, mystery, and intrigue! I'm not gonna even try to explain the plot, you just have to watch it. It is so good. I really hope it continues and people tune in. The show is a playground for former soap actors making cameos as well. And Ion Gruffudd (Mr. Fantastic from the Fantastic Four movies) is awesome in the show too! I can't stop talking to people about the episodes! Another thing I love about Ringer is the music. There is always great music in each episode. In fact, check out Lana Del Rey. Her "Video Games" song is so gorgeous. I love it!

So that is it for the new Fall shows. I have a lot added to my TV schedule. Of course this isn't counting the shows I watch that have returned for the 2011-12 season, along with my soaps. That all needs to be saved for another post, the DVR is busy! I am excited though for the Walking Dead to come back, and I am really interested in the new show Once Upon a Time. It seems like Lost meets a fairy tale. I think I will be hooked!   

Custom Jem dolls!

Alright I have fantastic news for you all. I have it on high authority that Jem is coming back. And by high authority I mean Wikipedia. Rumor has it that Hasbro is planning on showing some new Jem dolls and I am assuming a new cartoon. None if this has been validated, but what we do know is that Hasbro will have a booth at the upcoming New York Comic Convention this month. They released a statement detailing that they will be showing new product and Jem and the Holograms was included as new product.

So what does this mean? It means that I am reliving the past and may actually have the chance to own some new Jem stuff. Back when the original dolls were out, I never really wanted any. I loved the cartoon, but the actual dolls were rather odd. As an adult I am kicking myself for never owning any, but when I was little all I could think was, "The Jem dolls are much bigger than my Barbie dolls, so how on Earth will they fit into the same imaginary world?" It just didn't work.

Now around last May when the Hub started airing old Jem episodes I got the idea to make my own custom Jem dolls. I got tired of waiting for Hasbro to make a move with new stuff. I just had to have a Jem doll, like ASAP. I will be first in line to get any new Jem stuff, however I am rather pleased with my custom Jem dolls. I will share some of the ones I have put together with you all! It is your lucky day!

First up is Jem:

As you can see, this is more like an updated 2011 type Jem doll. She still has a shiny metallic pink dress, but it is strapless. She has a shorter pink hair-do and some sparkly tights. All she needs is a sound stage. Or a rockin roadster.

Here is a closer photo. I did not bother painting the crazy face make-up stuff like the old Jem either. I mean what is the point? I have no idea how to paint a doll's face and I am certainly not going to start now. And for those of you who are wondering, this Jem doll is courtesy of Barbie. I used a Swappin Style Barbie doll and a Swappin Style (SS) head. This line of Barbie dolls from Mattel are amazing because you can create all kinds of new characters. Let's just not say anything to Mattel about using their Barbie dolls to make my own special Hasbro Jem dolls, ok? I do not want to start a toy civil war. Most of the clothing is new, except for the silver belt and tights, those are vintage Barbie clothes (from a 1985 astronaut Barbie.)

Now we shall move on to Kimber!

Here we have Kimber, good 'ol messy Kimber. Kimber was made courtesy of the SS barbie dolls. Her pink hair is spot on for Kimber. I tried to find some blue pants, but instead this newly updated Kimber has a pink pair. The pants are actually vintage and come from the astronaut Barbie mentioned earlier. I love how in the '80s Mattel made an astronaut Barbie doll with a pink and silver color scheme (Barbie was highly fashionable in space.) The white tuxedo jacket and shoes are new Barbie clothes. I am actually thrilled, the jacket came from a new doctor Barbie, and it was perfect for Kimber's jacket!

The only thing this Kimber needs is two men fighting over. And a keyboard.

Next up is the lovely Shana:

Now I know what you are thinking, isn't Shana supposed to have a light purple hair color? She is, however I had a very hard time finding an African American Barbie doll with purple hair. I know there are a few, but for now Shana is just going to have a normal hair color. This was not a SS Barbie, but the actual '80s Astronaut Barbie doll! She is sporting a nice purple dress though and oversized '80s style jacket. I think she embodies Shana rather well, even though the hair isn't right.

Her hair color may be wrong, but look at her electric blue eye shadow! That is totally something that Shana would have worn on the show. In fact I think she did. The dress and shoes are new, but the jacket was a reproduction from a vintage Barbie doll. I love reproductions.

The final custom I have is Raya:

Ok I will admit, out of all the custom Jem dolls I made, Raya is the biggest mess. Her pink hair is perfect, but this doll was a part of some Barbie butterfly show, so the mold has a much smaller frame than a regular Barbie doll. All the clothes I tried to put on her were way too big. This outfit was the only one I could find that fit decently and looked like a fun tacky '80s Jem get up. I also tried to make her veil into an interesting Gaga-esque hat. I just hope she doesn't look like a hooker extra from Pretty Woman. That was not my goal.

Here is another photo of her. Her makeup is subdued, but I think Raya (from the cartoon) had a less-is-more approach to makeup anyway. The dress, belt, and jacket are from a Barbie vintage reproduction. Actually the clothes came from a Barbie and the Rockers reproduction, which makes the whole custom so ironic. Barbie and the Rockers was a line of dolls made to rival Jem and the Holograms. So I find it quite funny that I am using a Barbie doll and some Barbie and the Rockers clothes to make a Jem doll. Somewhere my old Barbie and the Rockers dolls are rolling over in their plastic bin.

Finally here is a picture of the set. I know I am missing Aja, but I have had the toughest time finding a teal haired doll. I have not given up my search though and will find one! I mean these Holograms are missing their bandmate! Aja just has to join them! 

I have also been thinking of how to customize some Misfit dolls. I think that would be so cool. I mean everyone needs a custom Pizzazz doll. She hates hippies and Jem. What more could you ask for?

So until next time folks! I hope you liked the custom Jem dolls, and if you want more information about any of these dolls or any tips on customizing Barbie dolls, just ask!

Also, be sure to check back, because I will be addressing the new Jem stuff once there is any news from Hasbro!  

Toy Chest Tuesday! Shimmers

Hello fellow toy enthusiasts! Welcome to another edition of Toy Chest Tuesday! Can you hear the chanting? Anyways today we are going back in time and looking at Kenner's Shimmers! Made in 1986, Shimmers were basically half human/creature dolls. There was a mom character and she came with a baby. Totally cute! Here is a brief description about Shimmers, courtesy of ghostofthedoll

"The Legend from the Shimmering Forest. In a secret land of fantasy live beautiful creatures, wild and free.  Their delicate bodies glisten like pearl...part woodland animal, part beautiful girl. To most of us they can barely be seen at dusk and at dawn, and not in between. But to those lucky few who wish they could be like a horse in a meadow or a mermaid at sea, this secret land is always in sight, and beautiful Shimmers will always shine bright."

I like the part about those who wish they could be like a horse in a meadow or a mermaid at sea. I love mermaids. They are my favorite creature. I fully believe they are real. Or at the very least that my ancestors were mer-folk. I mean really. Mermaids are awesome. I remember growing up and my mom telling me stories about her dad going fishing in the ocean. As the story would go, her dad would fish with the mermaids. He would talk about how gorgeous they were and the beautiful songs they would sing. I never got to meet my mom's dad, but I hold that story very close to my heart. 

Anyways, back to the toys! I had three Shimmers. And before we go on I just have to say, these toys are rare and hard to find. In other words they are super expensive. If you want to buy one mint, I suggest selling your vital organs, or your first born.

The first set I had was a deer mom and little deer baby. 

Here we have Deerlene & Baby Doette. Clearly by the name, these are half human/deer creatures. Deerlene also has a bird on her hand. I feel like these two are the singers in the Shimmering Woods. Like somewhere Snow White is in the woods thinking she can sing, when in all reality it is really Deerlene. I'm not a fan of the name though. Deerlene? Really? Worst name ever. 

The next one we have here is Sunstreak and Baby Winglet. Sunstreak gave her baby the 2nd worst name ever. Baby Winglet? That sounds like something you order at Wingstop! I mean that poor baby must be the target of every hungry beast in the Shimmering Woods! They are cute though!

Finally the best Shimmers ever! We have Seaquin and Baby Splashy. Seaquin probably has one of the coolest names ever. I mean her name is Seaquin! Her top looks so cool and her bracelet is made of starfish. How could anyone not like her!

I remember when I first got her. My parents and I were getting ready to leave for a family vacation to the beach. All I could think of was, "I need the perfect accessory to go to the beach. Mermaid Shimmers!" Well I had begged and pleaded to have my way. The plan was simple, before driving to the beach my parents would take me to K-Mart. We would run in and pick up Seaquin and her baby. Everyone involved was on board!

Only there was one problem. As we were leaving we found ourselves in a really bad thunderstorm. My parents were like, "We don't have time to head to K-Mart! We need to head to the beach!" I wasn't having that. I refused and demanded that we still go to K-Mart, regardless of the dangerous weather! I was such a brat! But I got my Mermaid Shimmer! The perfect accessory to take to the beach. Except I didn't really take Seaquin to the beach. I have never liked the idea of bringing toys or dolls to the beach. I mean essentially sand is just dirt. Right? Why would i want to bring my nice collectibles to the beach? That's just grody. Anyways, I don't even like the beach. Being there is bad for my porcelain skin. After all, my ancestors lived under the sea. Far from the sun. I'm serious.

Until next time!  

Night of the Living Roach 4: The Final Battle Part 2

Wanting to have a good Night? Here is the second part to Night of the Living Roach 4!

Click here (NOTLR 4) to find out what you missed, and prepare for the ultimate in terror...

Night of the Living Roach 4: The Final Battle Part 2

Glimmer and Mainframe find themselves surrounded by Roaches. After their dangerous escape from the Castle Grayskull playset, Glimmer really believed that she would find safety. This can't possibly be how her story ends? Not after everything she has been through to be free.

Mainframe looks at the pink haired toy, "Ma'am, I'm real sorry about this." Glimmer shakes her head, this is nobodies fault. Glimmer closes her eyes and prepares for the horde of Roaches to roam over their bodies.

Nothing happens. Glimmer looks at Mainframe, how come they have not been eaten alive yet? There is a movement among the Roaches and two large Roaches in walk towards the weakened heroes. One of the Roaches is Sky-Spy with his wings aflutter. He motions to his colleague, "Slashor, look at our prey. They are starting to realize that there is nothing they can do. We can make this easy on you two, come with us peacefully."

Mainframe knows there can be no peace, the Roaches will kill Glimmer and him. He refuses to go down without a fight. He briefly looks at Glimmer, "Get ready to run." Glimmer is confused, "What?" To her horror, Mainframe rushes towards Sky-Spy and plans to attack.

Slashor, Master of Sharp Things, reaches out and grabs Mainframe by the neck. The G.I. Joe figure struggles and tries to escape. With legs dangling in the air, Mainframe coughs out, "Let me go!" Slashor shakes his head. Sky-Spy looks up at the would be hero, "Such a silly move. I hate to do this, but your time is over. Slashor, dispose of him."

Glimmer screams. Slashor laughs, "Hee hee. Bye bye." Mainframe's chest is raised apart from his legs, exposing his toy organ system of rubber bands. The rubber bands connect Mainframe's torso to his crotch and legs. Mainframe tries to kick free, but screams in pain as Slashor cuts one of the rubber bands. Mainframe is dangling. Glimmer tries to help her new friend, but covers her face as Slashor cuts the other rubber band. Mainframe's legs fall to the Attic floor. The Roaches all laugh with glee and chaos. Slashor drops the rest of Mainframe on the ground.

The G.I. Joe hero crawls to his legs, "Oh no." Glimmer rushes to him, "Mainframe! This can be fixed! We can get out of here!" Sky-Spy laughs and motions for the Roaches to close in around Glimmer. Mainframe looks around and utters a few last words, "Glimmer. Run. Get out of here..." Nothing makes anymore sense for Glimmer. Mainframe is gone and there is nowhere else to go. Glimmer looks around and prepares to run but is stopped by Sky-Spy.

"Don't even think about it Glimmer." Sky-Spy says. Glimmer realizes there is nothing else she can do, "What do you want with me?" The flying roach sneers, "I want nothing to do with you. My boss seeks a meeting though, and if you want to live you will go with us." Glimmer thinks about her options. Should she run? She looks at Mainframe in pieces before her. There is no other choice, "I will join you." Sky-Spy nods, "Smart move. Roaches, carry her! We are going to Attic #1." A Roach soldier looks at Sky-Spy, "What of the human?" Sky-Spy grins, "Don't worry about Miss M. Someone will be taking care of her soon enough..."

Meanwhile...

Finally finished with her earlier conversation with She-Ra, the lovely M heads to the Hallway. Before leaving the room one of the action figure heroes, Psylocke, looks at M and asks, "Hey M, where are you going?"

"I am going to take a shower. My shift earlier today at the dollar store was a mess. Someone decided to use the food aisle as a toilet. I'm talkin Number 2, all over the place. I was also hit on by a creepy man. He liked my voice so much he told me I should be a phone actress."

Psylocke smiles, "Oh love! Fantastic, you now can move on to a better job! Acting shouldn't be too hard, you have done Shakespeare in the park! Now you can do Shakespeare on the phone, how utterly revolutionary!" Psylocke claps her hands together.

Miss M shakes her head, "That is not what phone acting is about. Just think about it Psylocke. Phone acting..." Psylocke soon realizes what M is talking about, "Eww." M nods, "Right? I so need a shower. And another job. Hey, watch over April and Janine for me ok? I think they might go after each other." Psylocke nods.

Walking through the Hall Miss M hears scary Halloween music blaring from Markiki's room. M's brother has been furiously working on his Halloween costume, a custom Beetlejuice outfit. To find himself in the creative spirit, Markiki has been playing hauntingly ghoulish music on a loop. Passing Markiki's room and heading to the Bathroom, Miss M stops underneath the ceiling door to Attic #2. It sounds as if there are screams above her head. For a split second M feels as if there is something horrific happening. "I wonder what would happen..." M tells herself as she reaches up to open the attic door. What if someone is in trouble? What if it is Glimmer? M knows this is crazy, but let's be real, she talks to toys. The toys talk back. Crazy flew out the window ages ago.

As the lovely heroine is about to open the door a voice calls out, "What do you think you're doing?" Miss M screams out loud and turns to see Mama P staring at her. "Well M? What are you doing?" Miss M thinks fast, and starts humming the theme song to Loony Tunes. She does a quick tap dance and tosses out her best jazz hands. Once the song is finished M strikes a kooky pose in front of her mom.

"M? Are you on drugs?" Mama P asks full of concern. Laughter rings out in the Hall, "Of course not! I was just exercising! I'm gonna take a shower now!" M rushes into the Bathroom and slams the door shut. Locking the door behind her, M removes her hairclip and lets her long dark hair fall down. She slowly starts removing her clothes while pausing to turn the water on. The shower starts as the temperature starts to rise.

Looking at herself in the nude in front of the mirror M tells herself, "You look great. A total hot piece. For real. You'll find a man. A good man. Not some creepy old man that drools over your voice either! Though your voice is rather sexy. Right?" M does her best seductive voice, "Tell me, do you like sexy movies? What's your favorite sexy movie?" Oh goodness, get over yourself she thinks to herself. 

There is a loud bang on the door, "Who are you talking to in there?" Markiki asks. M screams and jumps, "No one! Go away!" Markiki groans, "Oh hurry already! Dinner is gonna be ready soon." Markiki walks off to see Mama P and Big Daddy in the kitchen. Big Daddy looks at Markiki, "What's she doing?" Markiki shrugs, "Gettin ready to take a shower. She's also talking to herself again." Big Daddy and Mama P look at each other, they know their daughter is slightly weird. Big Daddy goes on, "Well she better hurry. Your mother made meat loaf. No one messes with me and the meat loaf."

Back inside the Bathroom there is a lil steam filtering around the room. M steps into the shower and embraces the warm water all over her body. She wants to wash the day away. Life has been rather strange as of late. Nothing makes sense. Roaches attack out of nowhere. Old men at the dollar store want her to do phone acting. This can't be everything she has to look forward to. There is more to her life than this right? 

Reaching for her shampoo M laughs out loud, "Herbal Essences! Oh my goodness, let's bring it back!" M lathers her hair and starts moaning out loud. The moans grow louder and faster, mimicking the old Herbal Essences commercials. "Yes. Yes. YESSSS!" M screams faking pleasure as she starts rinsing her hair. "Ah, Herbel Essences!"

In the Kitchen Mama P and Big Daddy hear the moans from the Bathroom and look at Markiki. M's brother shrugs, "Hey, she's your daughter." Mama P shakes her head, "How crude! What has gottin into her!"

M giggles in the shower, "Maybe I could be good at phone acting. How hard could it be?" Miss M is under the faucet rinsing her hair some more. Unknown to her a pair of antenna dangle over the shower head. Splashor peeks over and looks down at the lovely and naked Miss M. The Roach watches her shower, monitoring her every move. He is waiting for the right moment to make himself known. 

Humming the theme song to the She-Ra cartoon, Miss M leans her head back and looks up. For a brief moment her eyes catch a movement. "What?" M shudders. Stepping back from the streaming water, M rubs her eyes to make sure she isn't seeing things. She splashes some water towards the shower head. Nothing happens. Slowly approaching the shower head, Miss M holds her breath and tilts the shower faucet down. 

The sounds of legs running across the ceiling reverberate in M's head. The heroine looks up and screams as she spots Splashor racing across the ceiling. M grabs as much water in her hands as she can and tosses the water above her. Splashor screams and loses her footing. Sliding down the slick shower wall, Splashor leaps off the wall and kicks M in the chest. She flies acoss the shower. Slamming into the wall, M gives a swift kick in the air, trying to knock Splashor down into the draining water. 

Losing her footing, M slips and falls to the shower floor. Screaming all the way down, M lands hard on her butt. Splashor laughs and races up the wall again. He is ready to attack. M screams for help.

In the Kitchen, Big Daddy slams his hands on the kitchen table, "That's it! What in the hell is going on in there! Doesn't she realize that dinner is almost ready! It's meat loaf tonight!" Markiki rolls his eyes, "I'll go check on her." Markiki walks to the Bathroom and tries to open the locked door, "You ok in there M?"

M screams, trying to get out of the water, "A Roach! Markiki, help me! It's another Roach!" Markiki pretends he can't hear, "Oh shit. Again?! Bye thu thu cougs!" He runs far away, there will be no Roach experiences for him.

Inside the shower, Splashor is ready to dive from the ceiling again, hoping to hit M's head. The blow will be fatal and the Roaches will finally be rid of the meddling heroine. M screams once more and jumps out of the way. Holding onto the shower curtain, M falls outside of the shower and onto the tiled floor with a loud thud. 

With so much steam in the room, M can't see where Splashor is at, "Alright bastard! I know who you are. Come and get me Splashor!" The steam is clouding the bathroom even more. All she can experience is the evil laugh of the Roach. Standing in the room stark naked, M feels like this will be it. Her final battle. Only one of them is going to survive. It will end now.

<It can't end yet love.> M feels someone telepathically communicating with her <Psylocke? Is that you?> 

<Yes M. It is me. I could sense you were in danger, and thought I would help. I'm with you telepathically, but I am also going to meld with you and allow you to use my psychic knives to fight this creep.>

M is confused <Is that even comic accurate Psylocke? I didn't know you could do all that!>

Psylocke continues <Who cares, I'm your toy. Here, do you feel my powers?> M smiles as the psychic knives appear over her hands. <Wow Psylocke! This is so cool! Just don't let us end up swapping our minds and bodies ok? This isn't the '90s.>

<Don't worry, M. Just fight for your life!> Psylocke says. M nods, <Will do. Before I fight this thing, do you think you could do some mind trick and give me some clothes? I'm naked.> M feels Psylock shrug in her mind <Sorry love, your on your own with that.> 

<Thanks.> M rolls her eyes. She will not fight a roach naked. She just won't. Reaching into the nearby cabinet, M grabs a towel and wraps it around her body the best she can, "Alright Splashor! Come on already! Face me! Let's end this now." M cuts through the steam, trying to see better.

Splashor emerges from the shower, "Your pathetic weapons will do nothing human. I cannot be killed. I will enjoy feeding on your brains." 

"Bring it. I'll even give you the damn spoon!" M screams and races towards Splashor. She does a fast bicycle kick into Splashor's chest. He flies back and lashes out trying to cut M. Dodging the attacks M jams a psychic knife into Splashor's side. Howling in mental pain, the Roach flings M across the room. M is on the floor trying to get up. Splashor walks towards her, looming over her, "I bet you taste so sweet." M shakes her head, tears in her eyes. When will it ever end? Splashor opens his mouth, ready to kill. With every bit of strength left, M jumps up driving the psychic knife into Splashor's head. The Roach flings back, he is motionless. M kicks him into the shower and watches him slide down the shower drain. 

M sits on the floor as the steam starts to dissipate, "It's over. It's finally over." With Splashor down the drain, M knows that there will be no way for the Roaches to find their way back inside the House. Everything was as it should be...

Across the House, in Attic #1, the Roaches deliver Glimmer to Roach Town. A seedy town full of bartering, boozin it up, and death matches. Glimmer takes everything in. Busted old Light Brites make up some of the dimly lit lighting. A few Roaches are trading various pieces and toy weapons with one another. There is a Roach playing a saxophone. A dome is in the center of Roach Town and Glimmer can hear screams inside, "What happens in there?" A Roach looks at Glimmer, "Death matches. Two Roaches enter, only one Roach leaves." Glimmer shakes her head, why does she feel like she is living in a movie? If only...

Sky-Spy and Slashor walk Glimmer to an elevator that brings the pair up to a room on top of some scaffolding. As the elevator doors open, Glimmer notices a large Roach off to the side, with a cloud of smoke surrounding him. Crumbs of food are littered around his face and legs. Sky-Spy pushes Glimmer out of the elevator, "Don't touch me!" she shouts. Slashor jumps up with a blade drawn at Glimmer's face, "Pretty pretty." Glimmer closes her eyes.

A voice calls out from the darkness, "Leave her alone." Sky-Spy and Slashor step to the side. The saxophone playing Roach walks out of the darkness first, followed by a female Roach. This is the first female Roach that Glimmer has seen. The female Roach looks to the side, "Ton-Ton, play something... tragic. You must be Glimmer. Would you like something to eat? Cracker crumbs? Old fruit?" The female Roach snarls at the lounging Roach, "Roach-Clip! Get up! Stop eating all of our food!"

Glimmer gags, "Ugh. I'm not even close to being hungry. What am I doing here?" The female Roach looks at Glimmer, "My name is Rita, daughter to the Cockroach King and Queen, may their insectoid souls rest in peace. The oaf in the corner is my older brother, Roach-Clip. I have been granted leadership of the Roaches. Welcome to Roach Town."

"I don't want to be here." Glimmer says crossing her arms. Rita laughs uncontrollably, "That is funny. You won't be leaving. I have uses for you. So please sit a spell and let me explain why you are the key to the Roaches finally taking over total control of the House." The Roaches in the room all start to cackle, except Roach-Clip. He isn't quite sure what is going on. Glimmer sits there, terrified, "Oh Miss M, where are you?" She whispers to herself, silently shedding her tears...

Good bye All My Children!

Well everyone, that is it. Yesterday marked the end of All My Children. To capture the moment I planned a whole viewing experience. I was going to watch a farewell TV Guide show honoring AMC. After that it was on to the special View episode paying tribute to the end of an era. Finally I was going to watch the last AMC episode on ABC. I had my tissues, Tab, and Chewy Lemonhead & Friends Fruit Candy all around me. So good.

After watching the TV Guide special I couldn't wait any longer. My viewing plans were derailed. The View was going to have to wait. I jumped in and watched the final episode of AMC. Tears started flowing as soon as the show started. I could not stop crying for the entire episode. Waves. Waves of emotion all over my face. I was a damn mess.  

Everything flew by so quickly! I won't give away in plot points, but everything seemed like it was ending on a perfect note. Until the last two segments. The final episode built to one crazy cliffhanger. Let's just say this, if the show does not go online I will be so mad. This cliffhanger was out of control. I have to know what happens next.

People can say whatever they want, but soaps are really great. I am going to miss AMC. It is very strange to know that on Monday I won't be taping that show on my DVR. The actors and characters they portray, everyone that makes the show work, are all so wonderful. I've never met them personally, but they have left an impact on me. Agnes Nixon, the creator of AMC, really made something special. And I am glad that I have had the chance to watch the show for as long as I have. I hope that the show will continue with most of the cast still in tact.

I have never really told anyone this, but soaps are a big reason why I love to write and use my imagination. I don't pretend to be some great writer or anything, however the excitement and possibilities about soaps led me to want to write my own stories. To have my own voice and share that with people that are interested. So yesterday was a really sad day for me, I am going to miss AMC for what it was. I hope that it will soon become something even better when it moves to an online format!

Stay tuned!

I've been busy, drinking Tab.

I know I have basically been neglecting my dorkette duties this week. There was no Toy Chest Tuesday. I keep meaning to do a new Trashy or Timeless. Night of the Living Roach 4: The Final Battle Part 2 needs to be posted. What is going on with me? I am usually on it.

However I have had a really busy week. I've been drinking Tab. Well Tab is not exactly why I have been slacking on my dorkette musings. However Tab did help me fit into a fun pink dress last weekend, and worked me into a rather lovely outfit for my mom's first signing party launching her new cook book! It was last night and let me tell you all, we worked our tushes off.

She was signing the books while I was doing the cashier duties and bagging the books up. Let me start off by saying I was in the cutest pair of skinny jeans and this amazing drapey yet slimming '70s inspired top. Oh, and 6 inch heels. I can't understand for the life of me why I put myself through such torturous lengths to look great. I literally could not feel my feet this morning.

Anyways the book signing was fabulous. Thankfully Auntie M and my other cousins arrived to help us, because it got out of control. So many people came out to support my mom and I was so proud of her. She has worked so hard to get this cook book out. It was just an amazing night! I also need to practice more on my Brain Age for the DS, because I totally got how to run the credit card machine thing, but counting out change from cash was a struggle. I mean I know how to spend money, not count it. Let's be real. I grew up in the age of calculators. However I will work on that, I just need to start playing Brain Age again and I'll be fine and ready to dole out change to anyone! (For the record when I worked retail the registers helped with change too! I mean come on! My brain age is old and moldy people.)

So let's talk Tab. Book signings are awesome and all, but Tab has truly become my new drink of choice. For those who don't know, Tab is a diet drink that basically tastes like Coke with Sweet 'n' Low. It sounds disgusting, but I love it. And it comes in a pink can!

I remember when I was 4 or 5 and I just loved the pink Tab cans. I begged my mom to buy some in the store and she was like, "I know you like pink, but you are too young for a diet soda." She also told me I'd hate it. I refused to believe her lies and did my best spoiled sad face to prove my point. My mom caved and bought some. I feel sorry for my parents, because I was really this crazed diva child. I don't know how they survived raising me. Really, I don't.

Having gotten my way, we went home and I patiently waited for the Tab to chill. I drank it wanting to like it. Instead I felt sick. I hated it and my mom ended up proving a very important point. I was to young for diet drinks, even the ones that came in a pink can.

Back to the present, I recently read a small article about Tab. I found myself walking down memory lane and curious to buy some again. After all I am cautiously approaching 30 and I want to look amazing when I reach a new decade of personal life. Maybe a diet drink will be better for me than my tasty Dr. Pepper. Truth be told I also wanted to buy the pink can again and just see if my taste buds had changed.

I can honestly say, I love Tab! I am a Tab-aholic, or whatever Tab fans call each other. I wonder if there is a Tab fan club? I mean surely there is. The soda is hard to find in stores, so there must be some hardcore group of people that insist on it being at certain places. I think I will do some investigating.

Now I'm not drinking a six pack a day. I usually drink one soda a day, unless I'm having one of those rough days and I might drink two. But with Tab, I don't feel so bad having a soda. There are no calories. Just saccharin. I'm assuming that stuff is safe. Are we still supposed to be believing in that cancer myth? I hope not.

Anyways, that is all for today. Tab is good. I am also proud of my mom. I think if we could bottle up her energy and ability to make her dreams come true, we would all be in a better place. Speaking of better places, Pine Valley is really the place to be. This week has been some of the best soap tv ever. Tomorrow is going to be a rough day.

Also, Night of the Living Roach 4: The Final Battle Part 2 is going to be awesome! We will find out what happens to Mainframe and Glimmer. And Miss M finds herself in a fight for her life against a vile Roach.