Nerds Who Lunch

Hey everybody. So remember when I said I was a part of an exciting project awhile ago? Well I am now finally ready to sort of give away what that project was. I finally got to be on my very first podcast experience and it was with the always fun Nerd Lunch podcast. For those who are not aware, Nerd Lunch is a part of the Atomic Geeks Podcasting Network and the Nerd Lunch podcast is hosted by a trio of really cool guys, CT, Jeeg, and Paxton Holley.

I've listened to Nerd Lunch every so often for awhile now. It is a really great podcast. One of the first episodes I heard was when the group was talking with the Sexy Armpit about Saved By the Bell and all I could think of was, "This is the coolest freakin' thing ever." I highly suggest that if you haven't yet, head over to the Nerd Lunch podcast. It is so worth it. CT and the guys put a lot of work into each episode and the guests they invite are always people I imagine would be a blast to hang out with.

Anyways, so last night I joined the podcast with CT, CW (Claymation Werewolf of the Retroist awesomeness) and Paxton Holley. Only, I almost didn't make it. So while we wait for the new episode to go up this coming week, I thought I'd share my huge misadventure and how I almost missed the call to join in and be a part of Nerd Lunch.

I was originally meant to leave work yesterday at 4:30 pm. It was the perfect schedule. I was going to have plenty of time to go home and shake off the stress from the day and get ready for the podcast recording. I was super thrilled. I have been since I was first asked. Last Spring CT had emailed me in regards to joining in on an episode, but I couldn't due to some personal stuff. Cut to a couple months ago and I was asked again and nothing, I mean nothing, was going to stop me from being a part of this.

As the clock struck 4 at work I was eagerly awaiting the countdown until 4:30 pm. Only that didn't happen. The cosmetics and fragrance department where I work has been seriously understaffed lately. A wave of people were let go and the store has been a bit behind in finding people to fill those spots, so I noticed that things were very hectic and crazy. I didn't want to be that girl that just abandons the ship while the other few are freaking out with all the customers.

So I stayed, but I knew I had to leave at a certain time because I was expecting the call at 8:30 from the podcast. It was no problem. Until it became a problem as things so often do. The cosmos really love throwing whatever they can at me, I think to see how I will respond. But since I have She-Ra, Wonder Woman, and Storm on my side, there is nothing that will keep me down for long.

A customer had called earlier in the day asking if we could do a full-on makeover for her because she had a splashy event to get to that night. I explained that we were incredibly busy but that someone would more than likely be able to help her. I didn't want that person to be me. Like I've said before, I know how to apply my own makeup, but I am very nervous at applying my hand to someone else's face. Unless it is an Erica Kane situation and my enemy deserves it. Joking. Sort of.

Anyways, the lady arrived and no one wanted to do her makeup. No one. I was freaking out. My new co-workers were still trying to learn the ropes of the department so I was helping them while trying to also help a growing number of agitated customers. (One lady stormed off saying, "I'm going across the street, that other store is much faster than this.") Can I just say, I have totally forgotten how crazy retail is. I don't know what it is, but some people tend to think that retail workers are half wits. I was trying to help multiple people and my co-workers all at once. It was just not going to work out for everyone.

Then there was the case of the lady who wanted her face to be flawless for her evening event. It was up to me, and me alone. She wasn't sure I was the woman for the job. I really wasn't. I am a marriage and family therapist, not a makeup artist. I was shaking. The lady was a lawyer. All I could think was, "Can I be sued if I make her face look busted?" I can't be sued. Right? You can't be sued for applying makeup in the wrong way. I mean what would I even be sued for? I'm practically poor. I'm rich in She-Ra toys, but a court wouldn't take that away from me? Right? I'll hide those toys if I have to.

The process was terrifying. I've applied makeup before to other people, but not like this. She got the works. I prepped her face with some toner to remove any excess dirt and grease. I then applied a nice primer to create the perfect canvas for her makeup. Next I brushed on foundation over her entire face. The eyes were the next to get beat as I filled in her eyebrows, shimmied a nice highlighter below her brows, dusted the prettiest shade over her lids before swiping a darker shadow in the creases of her eyes while topping that all off with a thin line of deep sparkly shadow that made her eyes snap crackle and pop. To complete the whole look I then added some subtle blush to her cheeks while lining and filling in her lips with a sultry shade of lipstick that I knew her husband would flip to see her in. She loved it.

She wasn't really a makeup girl. We were talking while I was fixing her up and she was like, "I'm a lawyer. I don't do much with my every day look, but I like feeling special every now and then." I was relieved that she felt special when she left with her products. Once that was all done I cleaned the station, fixed all the brushes and everything. Time was of the essence and I felt like I was in Adventures in Babysitting or Ferris Bueller's Day Off, like when the characters from those two movies are rushing to get everything done in just enough time.

I was clocked out and everything was good to go. I stepped out of the store at 6:50 pm and could only sigh, "I made it out. I will be home in plenty of time to sit back, gather my thoughts, and await the recording for the episode at 8:30 pm." That's when I heard CT's voice looming over head, as if he was floating in the clouds, "Remember, we'll start recording at 8:30 pm Eastern Standard Time."

I slapped my head harder than Homer. I don't live in Eastern Standard Time. I live in the Central Standard Time Zone. Curse the cosmos! I had to be ready for the call at 7:30! It was 6:50-ish! Blasted Central Time! I screwed up. I felt my heart leave my body and flop around on the pavement in the parking lot. I never ran so fast in my life. My feet were swollen, they looked nothing like my regular semi-cute feet, but they got me to my car and it was time to go. I kicked the car into automatic high gear and I was off!

When it comes to laws, I do tend to mostly follow them, but I may have been speeding 5 miles over the speed limit to try and make it home in time. I had Beyoncé blaring in my car. My eyes kept twitching to the clock radio in fear that I wasn't going to make it in time. I could not miss this. I had been looking forward to being a guest on Nerd Lunch for awhile now and this was really important to me.

So this of course means that the cosmos had one other trick up their sleeve: I got stopped by a train. Screams of really bad words flew out of my mouth so fast. The clock was still ticking and time was not on my side.

Somehow I made it home though with just a sliver of time left to spare. My parents and brother were going out to dinner with my aunt and uncle, so I did my best to usher them out. I live with a very loud family and I needed a quiet space. My dog got nervous with all the commotion of my family leaving and he went number one all over the freshly cleaned carpet in my parent's living room. I was just two seconds away from having a nervous break down. I had no idea how I was going to be ready.

I made it though. There were five minutes left until 7:30. I had some water so that my voice wasn't crappy sounding since I'd been talking all day. (Side note: I really hate my voice. So not only was I barely going to make it in time, I also had to deal with the fear of sounding like a total moron.)

However, once we were recording it all went away. I had a really great time. It was nice to talk to these guys. CT, CW, and Pax are really cool. They all have their own projects that they are working on and once the podcast is up I will share more with you all about where to hear it and how to catch up with them all. It was a wild and hectic Saturday, but it was totally worth it. A big thanks goes out to Nerd Lunch for asking me to be on an episode. It was a very fun experience.

I just wanted to share that with you all. I am off though, I've got some fun articles to come up with in regards to some reviews on Modulok and Glimmer. I also plan on catching up on all the comments I am behind with. Take care everyone!