I'm sure you're tired of reading this diary, but I died and came back to life in the body of Moth Lady. I know, why must I always repeat this in entry after entry? But what if some dork from the future finds this diary and flips to this page out of all the pages I've written in and they have no clue what is going on? What then diary? What then? They must know the truth. That I died in a sewer explosion. My cute little self was blown to bits by the devious wrestler Velvet Sky and I lost the love of my life. That's all about to change though diary. After making a deal with the devil, er, Maleficent, I returned. And though Michelangelo still doesn't believe that I am who I say I am, he will. I know he will be attending the posh fundraiser to save the Wii U from extinction, and I am going to use this as my chance to get him to finally realize that I am back. I just hope that the mental space I am sharing with the real Moth Lady won't muck things up. It's really hard to share a body with a villain. Especially when said villain lives under a bridge and is friends with every insect known to humanity. Goodness I could just curse Maleficent for this. Totally just curse her to the moon and back.
Miss M presents:
Save the Wii U!
Roach: Yes milady, you look splendid. Is there a village raid you are about to participate in?
Miss M: No. I'm going out tonight.
Miss M: (shakes head) Heavens no. I need to do this on my own.
Roach: Will you return milady?
Guy Friday: She was a bit tragic to work with, but you did need to hire someone after the demise of Miss M.
Irma: It's maybe a slow day?
April: (looks at a quiet Michelangelo) Are you ok Michelangelo?
April: Yeah, why don't you guys go mingle and find food. Take notes and interview people too for the Diary. While you all do that, I need to find the person behind this mess.
April: Neither was I.
April: Ha. You little half wit. This whole ensemble costs more than a piece of your premium hair extension. Don't think I can't spot a fake piece.
Mila: Oh April. Look around. I'm doing just fine on my own. Why, I don't even recall what my time was like at your silly little Diary of a Dorkette job.
April: (bites her tongue)
Mila: I'm so sorry, I forgot. They didn't want you playing yourself in that movie. They had to hire someone who wasn't a fossil. Good to see you April. Now if you'll excuse me...
April stands there with fists clenched.
Meanwhile, guests mingle!
Michelangelo: Totally. She was a gnarly dudette. Have you seen any pizza here?
April: Oh, that's good.
Chun Li: You seem really subdued. I thought you were the fun turtle.
Sonic: Wasn't that your second marriage to Casey Jones?
April: I didn't realize people were counting.
April: I'm surprised you are even here.
Sonic: Why not? We all know how the Console Wars ended.
Irma: Umm, yeah.
Cut Man: You're the prettiest girl at this gala. You have to pick one of us.
Cut Man: I know. It's rudeness like that, that makes me want to lock the human race up and let Wily's plans for robot domination come true.
Irma: Wow. You look really fancy.
Mila: (curses out loud) How am I going to marry into the vast fortune of Nintendo if Luigi is not even going to show up? Now I, like, have to deal with his second rate brother. I mean Mario? Really? I would have rather Luigi sent Wario instead.
April can only smile as Mila stands in annoyance. Neither of them notice Miss M's arrival in the body of Moth Lady! Scanning the crowd, Miss M looks for Michelangelo.
Moth Lady: (mentally screaming inside their shared brain) You will screw this up little dork girl!
Miss M: (looks down at Pinky Pie) What are you doing here? Are you really here or is this in my head?
In another section of the fundraiser, Irma tries to cheer Michelangelo up.
Michelangelo: I could totally go for some fresh air.
Miss M half listens to the speech as she slowly makes her way outside. She can't find her love, until he is right there, in her sight; talking with Irma.
Miss M strides forward.
Miss M: (ignores Irma) Michelangelo, I just need a few minutes. I can resolve this so simply!
Michelangelo: There's nothing to resolve mothball lady.
Miss M: Don't touch me! (she panics as she shoves Irma away and summons a swarm of ants to crawl up Irma's legs)
Moth Lady: (whispers in their shared head) You're losing your footing M. It's time for me to come out and play.
Miss M: (shakes her head) No, it wasn't supposed to be this way!
In another fit of panic, Miss M hurls herself towards Michelangelo and plants her lips right on his.
Miss M: (looks up with tears in her eyes and a mass of emotions rushing through her) I'm not a freak! I'm your true love!
Michelangelo: You are sick. You hear me! Sick!
Miss M loses it as she feels the door to her psyche creak open as Moth Lady comes out.
Miss M: Go to hell! (Miss M punches Michelangelo in the face and claws at him)
Michelangelo: Get away from me.
Irma: (looks down to see zero trace of ants on her) That weird lady from the office was just here. I could have sworn I had ants crawling all over me.
Michelangelo: She did something to Irma and she punched me.
April: Oh wow. That mothball lady is dangerous. We really need to file a police report.
April: Oh put a moldy sock in it Mila.
Mila: (looks around at the crowd and regains composure) Fine, like, totes fine. Everyone back inside. The pizza just got here.
Miss M: Well sometimes good doesn't win either. Oh Pinky Pie, I'm trapped. Don't you see? This isn't my body. I died. Everyone I know and love hates me. I'm so alone. On borrowed time.
Miss M: (looks out across the mountain trail) You can't. I won't let you out. I'm not going to fade away into nothing. I have to just end this.
Miss M: It's just one step. That's all.
Moth Lady: What are you doing? You wouldn't dare.
Pinky Pie: Come on Miss M, let's step away from the edge.
Moth Lady: NOO! Stop this at once! Let me out! Let me in control of my body you stupid dork girl!
Miss M: (blinks back tears) No.
To be continued...
End the Month of April with a whole new Bodacious Baddie!