But who cares about those stories right now! It's time to drool over some dream boat hunks! Click below to find out what the men of All My Toys are up to!
July 2014 Heroic Hottie
Alfred: I'm healing sir. I should be back soon.
Bruce Wayne: Take your time Alfred. There isn't much you can do at the Manor right now anyway. I'm healing too.
Alfred: Oh sir, I hope you are doing well.
Alfred: Do you think she wants to steal from you?
Bruce Wayne: (laughs to himself) Nah. She's a collector at heart. I'm sure she just wants to see everything. Maybe when I'm better I will take her there and show her everything.
Alfred: My goodness sir, you have never shown anyone your Archival Room. She must be a special lady.
Alfred: Well done sir. My heart swells to hear this Master Wayne. While Miss M has proven to be a rather off the cuff woman, I do feel that she has a heart of pure grace. Well done Master Wayne.
Bruce Wayne: Not so fast Alfred. I am not sure she even notices me like that. For now I just want to be here in this big lonely house. With her.
Alfred: I understand Master Wayne. I shall see you soon.
While Bruce Wayne rests with a heavy heart, two blossoming friends return from a fun filled day at a Pizza Festival as well as a walk through a Swiss Botanical Museum. Michelangelo and Mona Lisa soon find time to slow down for some one on one conversation at Dairy Queen...
Michelangelo: Totally. When they said it was the largest pizza ever, I was expecting a bodacious pie that reached up to the sky with gnarly toppings.
Mona Lisa: Yeah. Me too. A long sheet pizza isn't that bad though.
Mona Lisa: I even think I saw you crack a smile once or twice.
Michelangelo: It felt good to smile again.
Michelangelo: Cowabunga dudette! That sounds awesome.
As they both exit stage right to attend to summer fun, another Heroic Hottie is busy at work; with his own interview.
Guy Friday: Oh, I don't know. So... did you get all your questions answered?
Guy Friday: If you don't mind my asking, what are you doing here again?
Megan Fox: Oh. Yeah. I'm shadowing April O'Neil. I want to do her role justice so that I might bring a touch of gravitas to the Ninja Turtles movie.
Guy Friday: Doesn't that movie come out this August?
Megan Fox: Yeah. Your point?
Guy Friday: I don't see how that's going to work. There just isn't enough time.
Guy Friday: Oh there is plenty to worry about. Just be careful when April's left eye twitches. That's when you know something bad is going to happen.
Megan Fox: I'll keep that in mind.
Guy Friday: Want a Crush soda?
Megan Fox: Only if it's orange.
Megan Fox: (alone in the office) Like it's hard playing April O'Neil. Give me a break. I'm gonna rock this movie and I won't even need a close up on my lips, nose, or butt. Mmm. I'm suddenly craving a hot dog.
Megan Fox: (calls out loudly) Guy Friday! Let's get some dogs!
Bow: No. I can't imagine She-Ra ever stepping out on me. She is too honorable. I just can't shake it though, something has been off with her lately. Ever since she got back from saving Sea Hawk.
Bow: They did. Maybe they still do. I don't know.
Casey Jones: It's not easy being in love with lovely ladies of pop culture is it Bow? I mean, April and I went through a divorce and got married twice. She works her butt off at the Diary and she even has told me that they are making a movie about her that is going to be in theaters in August. When I say she is stressed, she is stressed.
Casey Jones: I don't think it was the heart. I think people thought you were gay because of that time you rode around on that horse with He-Man. It looked a little suggestive.
Bow: Come on. There was only one horse. How else were we gonna get around?
Bow: Yeah, which is why I'm going to do something about it. No more hiding in the shadows and being the joke on everyone's lips. I'm branching out. Onto bigger and better things. I'm planning on making a name for myself. I'm no longer going to be She-Ra's special friend. I'm gonna be the man who has a special woman.
Casey Jones: I'm really confused.
Casey Jones: Really?
Bow: Yep. I'm even thinking that there will be live entertainment.
Casey Jones: No way. Are you thinking what I hope you are thinking?
Bow: That's the fifty million dollar question; and one that will be answered in the fall... when my bar opens! Things are turning around for good old Bow!
Casey Jones: I'll say. Who knew you were such an entrepreneurial bad ass?
In yet another part of the world...
Raphael: We need to talk about our brother.
Donatello: Which one? There are two.
Donatello: Oh come on Raph. Master Splinter would not be happy with you talking about Mikey like that.
Raphael: You knew who I was talking about though.
Raphael: He's been moping for months about our sewer lair being blown to bits...
Raphael: That's besides the point. Now he's seemingly feeling better. He's been going out with Mona Lisa.
Raphael: That's not the point Donnie! Why is Mikey hanging out with my ex girlfriend?
Donatello: I think you are overreacting. We were all friends before you briefly dated her when we were teens. And didn't you dump her because you were too cool or something?
Donatello: Come on Raph. Do you really think there is something to get worked up about? This is Mikey. His only greatest love in life is pizza. Besides, he's too upset over Miss M. He isn't going to get involved with someone else. Now come on, do you want to Larp or what?
Raphael: Will I get to punch something?
Donatello: That's not really the point...
Donatello: But go ahead! Gimli brought a real ax. Have at it.
While an epic game of live action role play occurs, something else begins to unfold in the After Life. Deep in one of the towers where Miss Elizabeth is being held prisoner, she soon finds herself with the ultimate ally: Ed!
Ed: (perks up) You think she'd say that?
Ed: Yeah! I'm going to do it! I'll be back with the Angels!
And the clock ticks as the days pass. The Conference of Evil is coming ever closer!
July 2014 Heroic Hottie!