All My Toys: 302

Summer is here! Which means adventure and fun as Miss M begins a quest for Pizzarias to secure an interview with the mysterious Dino Drac and the hopes for a shot at a Bloglin, the most prestigious blogging award in the universe!

On the outskirts of town, by the Cherry Blossoms that were once the Forest of Darkness...

Wild One: I still can't believe how much this place has changed. I remember that night. That night you gave birth to Yvie. And now look at this place. 

Moth Lady: It's very lovely isn't it? Light that was born out of the dark. 

Moth Lady: A lot of life changing experiences since then. Wild One, as we get closer to our wedding, there is something I need to talk about from the past. A time when things were much darker for me.

Wild One: Ok. You can tell me anything. I'm always here for you. Hey.

Wild One: You look petrified. What is it? 

Moth Lady: I wasn't like you. Ya know? You knew who you were, you never felt the need to hide or be embarrassed. Unlike me, I carried such a deep shame for so long.

Wild One: It was different for you. I could be out, I was just a warrior in Dragon Queen's army. She didn't care what I did as long as I hacked my way through the villages and kingdoms she wanted control over. But you, you had to practically be a monk. You and Vultura were too important to her with your abilities. If she had known you had an attraction to anyone, she would have flipped. 

Moth Lady: Having to hide that part of me that I wanted to fully live in, to experience, I fell into such internal rage. That kind of rage made it easier to do her bidding. But you know, you were there.

Wild One: I was.

Moth Lady: You were able to see me, the real me. The parts I hid from Dragon Queen. I was at times thrilled and terrified equally. 

Wild One: I know. We engaged in a silent dance, stolen glances, accidental brushes of skin as we'd pass each other. 

Moth Lady: It killed me that we could not be free, that we couldn't even talk about what was long simmering between us.

Wild One: Yes. But my love, I know all this. I do not mind recalling darker times, but I feel that is not what you wish to tell me. I'm worried, are you ok?

Moth Lady: I am. Now. Here, with you and this life we have built together. You know for the past few years I've been working with the Sorceress at Castle Grayskull to manage my anger and to better unpack the past. 

Wild One: Yes.

Moth Lady: There are things I have come to understand in ways that are now different, and I have to tell you. Because of what we went through, and my having to ignore my sexuality, I turned to strong drink and opium dust. When the battles of the past were long over and Dragon Queen was operating at a fraction of her power, I was content to live my life in a haze. 

Moth Lady: And then I died. I knew I was doing too much and I didn't care. My heart stopped. I was under a bridge off of Main Street. I left my body. I found myself in the After Life. That moment allowed for Miss M's spirit to find home and settle into my pound of flesh. I knew this. In the After Life I had a guide. This guide helped acclimate me to what was happening. I was not fully dead, merely tethered to my body, while still free to roam the After Life. 

Wild One: I don't mean to interrupt, but I am confused. I thought when Miss M was in your body, the two of you wrestled for control?

Moth Lady: That was a phantom. An echo of my psyche, I was fully living in the After Life. I had no care about what was happening down here, had no interest of who was rummaging around in my bones. Life here was a prison, but in the After Life, I was free. No one cared about who I was attracted to. No one batted an eye that I had been a monstrous warrior. I had a life. It felt so wonderful. Such peace. I had no intent on ever returning to my body, because I had found... I had found...

Wild One: Take your time... It's ok. 

Moth Lady: I found love. I met this beautiful soul, she was such a healing force for me. It just happened. We fell in love and lived lifetimes together. Time flows so differently there. Once I met her, I truly had no reason to ever leave. It didn't matter to me what was happening here, I didn't care, because I was free. And then in a flash I was brought back. Back to my body. I still don't understand exactly how it all worked, what the magic was, but Miss M was made anew and I was no longer tethered to the After Life. When I became aware of what happened, I was filled with such rage. Yes, I was also with child due to M's actions, but my rage was so much more than that. There was no chance to say good bye to this love that spanned an eternity. I didn't get to see her again. My life of peace, of being free, I had returned to hell. And I was so angry. 

Wild One: I'm so sorry. This all makes so much more sense now. 

Moth Lady: Yvie saved me, having her, she forced me to realize that I would not go back to the way things were. And of course there was you. Which is why I wanted you to know. I could not have us betrothed and you not know this other life I have lived. Even if it means you might want nothing to do with me now.

Wild One: I am glad you told me. And it doesn't change a thing. I love you, and I am honored that I have seen you grow into this magnificent woman. We've both lived a past. Done things we regret. Loved others supremely. But we're here now, together, through all of this. It sounds like since unpacking the past, it has helped you to inhabit a different space for yourself now. 

Moth Lady: Yes, it has. I used to hate Miss M. I blamed her for so much when she was in my body, but we were both victims of circumstance and I could have returned but didn't. I so hated my life here, I had given up. And I know there is guilt that she carries for her decisions while trapped in my body. 

Wild One: Do you think this is something you will tell her? To shed light on context, to possibly further heal the rift between the two of you over all these years?

Moth Lady: Perhaps. She and I have been forever linked. I do believe this is something that would be helpful for her and I. At some point. 

Moth Lady: My main concern was to tell you. I love you and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I hadn't told you. Especially before embarking on this next stage of our lives. I want the wedding, and our future, to be nothing but brightness, like these cherry blossoms.

Wild One: I want that too. 

Big Boy's Penthouse, above Club Ritz...

Big Boy Caprice: (to an intercom) Let him in. (groans) This pain in my...

Big Boy Caprice: Well if it isn't Dick Tracy! If you came for that lasagna recipe, I'll tell ya, but it'll cost ya. 

Dick Tracy: I'm not here for a lasagna recipe Mr. Caprice. I'm here on official police business.

Big Boy Caprice: Oh me oh my, and here I thought we had a truce.

Dick Tracy: Truce was for one night only, I wasn't about to ruin M's plans that evening.

Big Boy Caprice: Then get on with it. I'm a busy man.

Dick Tracy: Very well. I'm coming like this out of respect for your daughter. We don't have to escalate the issue.

Big Boy Caprice: A little late Dick.

Dick Tracy: This involves the murder of Deathstroke. We were given information that pins you as our prime suspect. Now, you can cooperate and come down to the station quietly, or this can get messy. I can get a warrant for your arrest and to search your home and business, basically any place you've been to.

Big Boy Caprice: Oh things have already gotten messy Dick. Tsk. Tsk. Why would I want to murder some hack mercenary?

Dick Tracy: That's why you need to come down to the station, so you can answer some questions. Because it's technically more than just Deathstroke's murder. It's also the attempted murder of Bruce Wayne, on his wedding day. To your daughter.

Big Boy Caprice: Pinning that on me too?

Dick Tracy: Yes. Like I said, we can do this quietly or it can get out of hand quickly. I really think you should think of M and Yvie.

Big Boy Caprice: Don't you dare bring up my daughter and granddaughter, you understand me? You don't come into my home and tell me about the law. I'm above the law! Do you understand? I make the law my little pet. I know how the world works. And if you think for a moment that you're going to arrest me, you don't know, Dick. 

Dick Tracy: Very well, we'll do this the hard way. 

Big Boy Caprice: "Don't threaten me with a good time." Rock of Love. 

Dick Tracy: Whatever you say. 

Dick Tracy: I'll be back with that warrant.

Big Boy Caprice: We'll see how far you get with that.

Dick Tracy: Excuse me?

Big Boy Caprice: Do what you must Dick. I'll be right here.

Dick Tracy leaves.

Big Boy Caprice: (curses) Everywhere I turn I have to see this stronzo! Mother- (feels a sharp pain in chest before cursing louder) Itchy!

Itchy: You ok boss? Got the walls rattlin. 

Big Boy Caprice: It's that detective. 

Itchy: The one your daughter is seein?

Big Boy Caprice: Yeah. I need you to get the Mayor here, pronto. This dick is planning on getting a warrant for my arrest.

Itchy: Wha- boss. Not good.

Big Boy Caprice: No. Not at all, now go! What the hell am I paying you for? Get the mayor! Now!

Across town at Alf's Comics and Toys...

Miss M: Ok, so we need to play it cool Winston, ok? These comic store guys always have secret stuff hidden in the back, but if we appear too eager it will be nothing but, "Sorry, I don't have that here." Ya know?

Winston: Yeah, but Alf is our friend. He's going to be honest.

Miss M: Winston, I ended my box like a year or so ago. Do you know how many comics I was getting a month? I mean, I'm not saying I was keeping this place afloat, but Alf was getting a lot of my rupees every month. I am pretty sure he has it in for me. Even if it's just a little bit.

Winston: I think this quest for a Bloglin is starting to get to your head, maybe a little?

Miss M: Oh I don't know. It's just everything right now. I can't find Pizzarias anywhere. I assumed this would be an easy eBay sort of thing, but it has proven to be a nightmare. And then there's Dick, something seems off with him. I think I've been moving too fast. 

Winston: Or, he's just really busy?

Miss M: Winston, I need a win. Preferably all the wins. I'd like for once in my life to experience a relationship free of drama. And, I'd really like to get Dino Drac's attention for an interview. Winning a Bloglin, it could change my life. (starts to panic with a raised voice) I am trying to be the change I want to see Winston! 

Alf: Hey M! And Winston! Wow, a real Ghostbuster in my shop! Do you think we could take a picture together? Maybe help bring people in? Or, would that freak people out? I don't want anyone thinking this place is haunted. Although, that might create some interest in the place...

Winston: Sure, I'd love to take a picture. But before we do that, Miss M and I were wondering if you could maybe help us?

Miss M: Yes, you might be our only hope.

Alf: Laying it on a little nerdy hmm? What's this all about?

Miss M: Ok, so here's the Cliff's Notes of it all. The fate of the world rests on me being able to find a vintage sealed, or could be empty, bag of Pizzarias.

And just like that, a long silent pause.

Winston: (whispers) I think that might be a little too dramatic M.

Miss M: (whispers) No, no way. He's thinking.

Alf: Pizzarias? Is this one of those puff the magic dragon riding a carpet of wacky tobacky in the sky kinda thing? 

Miss M: What? No. I am very clear headed.

Alf: I just don't understand. Why is a discontinued food from the '90s going to save the universe? 

Miss M: Ok, I might be embellishing a bit, but it's really important. And comic store owners always have the really cool stuff in the back. I'll pay whatever I can, but please don't let it be too much.

Alf: I do have some relics in the back, but babe, why would I have expired food from the '90s? I mean we all loved Pizzarias, but an old bag? That's not a collectible, that's just trash. 

Miss M: No, not trash. More like a key. A very important key that is going to unlock fortune and glory.

Alf: I think you might be losing it. Which, not gonna lie, is kinda hot. But, I'm sorry M, I don't think I can help you. Interested in reopening your box though? (eyes widen into puppy dog eyes)

Miss M: (sighs) Yeah, go ahead. Sign me back up. 

Alf: Score! I'll get that set up now for ya. And M, don't worry, if I hear from anyone that might have an inside tip on Pizzarias, I'll let you know.

Miss M: Thanks Alf.

Alf: You got it dorkette. (Alf happily shuffles away)

Miss M: Winston, what am I going to do?

Winston: Hey, just breathe. Aside from stalking eBay, this is the first place you have looked into. There has to be other places.

Miss M: I feel like I am losing my mind.

Winston: (gasps in shock and surprise) Well would you look at that?! A box of sealed series 1 Garbage Pail Kids! Wow! (pauses) Sorry, I got sidetracked for a second.

Alf: (returns) Yeah, we just got that in. Ok, I've got your box set back up.

Miss M: (lost in thought) Hmm. Oh. My. Gawd. 

Alf: Oh no, you're changing your mind... (hangs head in defeat)

Miss M: No, keep the box open. (pauses in thought) Trash. Garbage. Winston, I know who can help us.

Winston: Ok, but should we buy the cards?

Miss M: Yeah, add 'em to my box Alf. I'll come back for them. Come on Winston, we're on a mission. I can only hope Oscar still lives by my old place...

Alf: Great, I'll have them saved for you. Great seeing you two! (pauses) Dang, I didn't get the picture with Winston. Aww man.

Vash's secret location...

MAL: I must say, your brain works in fascinating ways.

Vash: Oh honey, you have no idea. Just to be sure, you're still connected to that monstrosity of a computer I brought to Miss M?

MAL: Yes. Older computer models like that are quite easy to manipulate. 

Vash: And what are you finding so far?

MAL: She's still on a quest for Pizzarias. That appears to be the key.

Vash: Pizzarias? I don't understand.

MAL: Pizzarias. Pizza flavored chips made by magical elves released in 1991. There is a secret society of collectors that hold the Pizzaria as a grail item. Typically, bags preserved are highly sought after and quite difficult to procure.

Vash: Of course this would be the item she has to find. 

MAL: Do you doubt her?

Vash: She is her own worst enemy. This will consume her. And I just need her to do a simple thing.

MAL: (smirks) So she can win an award, right?

Vash: Ya know, for a computer, you really try to know way too much.

MAL: I'm more than a computer Vash. You should keep that in mind. Now, what do you really have planned?

Vash: That's for me to know. You just continue keeping tabs on our dear dorkette. 

MAL: Very well. 

The Cherry Blossoms...

Wild One: Feeling better? 

Moth Lady: Yes. Thank you for being so wonderful.

Wild One: Of course. Ok. So. We've seen the Cherry Blossoms. Everything is stunning. How about we get something to eat, and maybe you can tell me more about this great love you got to experience in the After Life? It sounds like she helped you to become more open with yourself.

Moth Lady: Yes, I'd like to tell you about her. 

Wild One: Did you ever try to reach her, through the After Life?

Moth Lady: No. At one time I feared trying to communicate with her would pull me into a dark place where I'd want to return to the After Life, this time without any tethers to the world, but, I've found reasons to live. To thrive. Though one day, I am sure, I'll be able to tell her. And that she'll hopefully understand.

The two lovers walk off together as the wind picks up and the pink blossoms stir ever so slightly.

Cue the chilling soap opera music as someone emerges...

???: You poor fool of a woman.

???: There will be no understanding. No understanding at all.

Up Next! Miss M meets up with an old neighbor! 

Like the previous posts on this blog, it is with great sadness that the blogging community lost William Bruce West. My heart goes out to his family, including his wife Lindsay and two daughters. Will contributed so much to the toy/comics/pop culture blogging and podcast community. His opinions on pop culture are the stuff of legend. Please check out the West Family GoFundMe and consider donating, they need our support more than ever. If you can't donate, please spread the word. West Family GoFundMe