December 2013 Bodacious Baddie 400 Extravaganza!

Here we are. The 400th post of Diary of a Dorkette! This is actually pretty funny as I was not planning the Bodacious Baddie to coincide with the actual 400th post, but sometimes things just have a way of working out. For those that are just tuning in, I interview toys. (There's actually a whole lot more to this blog, but one of its hallmarks is that I talk to toys.) Yes, they talk to me and I talk to them. It would stand to reason that I might need help, but I think I'm about as sane as it is gonna get around here. I started these interviews last year and expanded them in 2013. As a result I began to weave a little story as the toy version of myself interacted with all the heavy hitters from the larger toy world around us. 

Here's what you need to know. Toy Miss M is best friends with April O'Neil. They work together bringing their journalistic integrity to folks every month with hard hitting toy journalism. April is older, wiser, and jaded. She was divorced from Casey Jones though they recently remarried on Halloween. Toy Miss M started a whirlwind romance with her favorite Ninja Turtle Michelangelo that spanned over two posts, here and here. Over 20 years of friendship has now led to a very loving and stable relationship, something the dorkette had never expected. Actually, there's a lot she never expected, like, actually dating a Ninja Turtle.  

All is not what it seems though. Full of rage and hate for being made fun of in an old post, the wrestler Velvet Sky has slowly been plotting the downfall of Miss M. Having worked with the greatest villains in the universe, Velvet Sky has tried unsuccessfully to destroy Miss M. In fact, for a brief moment, Miss M even knew about Velvet Sky's dastardly evil machinations, but after suffering a blow to the head, Miss M does not realize the danger around her. Now, in cahoots with Hordak, Velvet Sky has devised the ultimate plan. Instead of just going after Miss M, Velvet Sky wants to destroy those most close to the dorkette. (And in some cases has actually succeeded) Enough back story though! Find out what happens next in this spectacularly tacky 400th Diary of a Dorkette post with the all new December 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

November 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Dear Diary,

These interviews just fly by, don't they? I can't believe it is that time again. It feels like it was yesterday that I was interviewing the Riddler and plotting with him to get Franken Berry and Elsa hitched so they'd experience nothing but boring bliss. On a side note, Franken Berry and Strawberry Shortcake are actually dating! It just seems so odd to me, why didn't I introduce them sooner? I'm really hoping they bake some yummy strawberry desserts for Thanksgiving. But enough of that, I need to find out who I am interviewing this month.

-M

Countdown to Halloween with the October 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Dear Diary,

Halloween is near. My teeth are chattering with the sugars. Folks are wearing costumes at the grocery stores and restaurants, like it is all common place. (I'm not even talking about children, these are grown folks with some impressive costumes.) It's driving me crazy because I have yet to find what I'm wearing to April O'Neil's Halloween Party of the Year. Anyways, I'm rambling just a tad too much. I need to find a book on love since Franken Berry and Elsa have been inseparable. It's kinda scary how fast they have fallen for each other. My matchmaking skills are just on point. Right? Diary, help me make sense of this!

-Miss M

September 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Dear Diary,

While still on my romantic high from my totally tubular date with Michelangelo, I have realized that the month of September is at a near end and I still have to interview a Bodacious Baddie! I was given top secret coordinates to find this month's vicious fiend, and I am hoping I make it out alive. Ok Diary, I need to get going. Wish me luck! I can't believe I'm telling my diary to wish me luck...

-Miss M

August 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Toy Chest Tuesday always comes and goes, but there can only be one August 2013 Bodacious Baddie! Click below and read on as I interview one scary baddie! (Toy Chest Tuesday will be back next week.)

July 2013 Bodacious Baddie! The Conference of Evil!!!

Dear Diary,

I went and did it this time. It is the biggest week of the year. San Diego Comic Con is well under way, and do you think I could be there, reveling in all the fun? Oh no. No, no, no. I get to plan on solving a mystery at this year's Conference of Evil. You see Diary, some evil mastermind is trying to kill me. There were whispers months ago that some world renown villain wanted me gone. And since my dear friend and mentor April O'Neil was badly injured last month in a dreadful wreck that was meant for me, well, April and I thought it was high time we get to the bottom of who exactly wants me gone. So here we are. My "official" reason for attending the Conference of Evil is to interview all kinds of villains and bad guys for this month's super special Bodacious Baddie. (But you and I know this is about much more.) Luckily for the stylish and cool, I've got a cute outfit for this thing. I've never really been to a Conference of Evil before, so I'm not quite sure what to expect. I just hope I survive this. Oh well, wish me luck!

Miss M

June 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Where did we last leave off? Oh yes, I was interviewing the hunky June 2013 Heroic Hottie, when out of the blue I got a terrible phone call. My mentor, and friend, April O'Neil was in the hospital! What dastardly fate fell upon those journalistic shoulders full of integrity and gumption? Read on dear reader, read on...

May 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Toy Chest Tuesday is going to be delayed this week, but have no fear, it will be back next week and better than ever! (We'll be visiting the 90's, when a certain female detective wore club dresses and essentially had a crazy skin condition courtesy of a symbiotic relationship with an ancient weapon. It's gonna be fun.) Anyways, read on for the latest!

April 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Interviewing plastic people is hard work. I've addressed this issue before, but when you have to deal not only with interviewing plastic folks, but also having a boss that is a pretty iconic piece of plastic, well it just gets so darn tricky. Take this month's interview for the Bodacious Baddie...

March 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Interviewing the various forces of evil for this blog every month can be a real challenge. Sometimes reaching a bodacious baddie is no big deal at all. Other times I really have to travel far. So when my mentor April O'Neil contacted me about this month's Bodacious Baddie, I was slightly hesitant. "Miss M, I need you to travel to a far away place. Can you do it?"

What was I supposed to say? No? You don't say 'no' to April O'Neil. In fact it is usually a smart idea to never make April O'Neil cross. (Don't even ask her about the whole Megan Fox thing.) Anyways, so when I was handed my assignment I realized I had no idea how to reach this month's baddie. No idea at all. It was becoming a nightmare to figure out how I was going to make this interview work. Just problems every which way I turned. So after thinking about it for awhile, it suddenly all made sense. Sometimes you just have to drive right into a problem, and that is just what I did. I simply drove my car into a tornado and landed in Oz... to meet the Wicked Witch of the West! (By the by, please, no one drive into a tornado. It hurt. A lot.)

March 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Diary of a Dorkette: Ya know, the details of your death were greatly exaggerated. It is nice to see you looking so fresh.

Wicked Witch of the West: Oh goodness, it was a movie Miss M. From ages ago. I didn't die in real life. Believe me, I still make mischief for all of Oz.

Diary: Well you may be alive, but I do offer my condolences to your sister. I mean that must have been terrible. One minute you're harassing some Munchkins and the next minute a giant house just falls on you. It sounds almost laughable.

WW: I can assure you dorkette, there is nothing funny about losing a sister to fallen house debris.

 

WW: (With a menacing glare) Where did you say you traveled from again? The United States of something-or-another? You aren't from Kansas are you?

Diary: Oh heavens no. I actually wish I could say I was from Etheria, but I tend to get strange looks from folks when I say that.

WW: Well whatever. As long as you aren't from Kansas. I have issues with Kansas.

Diary: Ok... On a good note though, Lady Gaga would totally kill for your chin. She has a thing with pointy body parts.

WW: Who is Lady Gaga? Is she a member of royalty?

Diary: No, not really. Though I guess some people would disagree. She has like her own House or something. Like House of Randor, but they just call it House of Gaga. So in some ways I guess she kinda is royalty. Maybe. I don't really know.

 

WW: I'm growing bored with this conversation.

Diary: Oh! We can totally change that. What would you like to talk about?

WW: I don't know. You are the one interviewing me!

Diary: Ok. Think M, think. How about the new movie? Congratulations on being part of a blockbuster!

WW: Ugh. Why must you associate me with that movie?

Diary: Why not? It was really good!

WW: I loathe any propaganda that makes me look... wicked.

Diary: Honey, have you taken a look at your name lately?

WW: Oh shut up!

 

Diary: Not for nothing, but I do think the Wicked novel does you justice. And honestly, you are always the best part of any story. I have always really looked up to you for some strange reason.

WW: If I was a kind hearted person I'd say thank you. But I am not.

Diary: That's ok. We do share a cackle laugh though! I have always had that cackle sound. Drove the cafeteria nuts in middle school.

 

WW: I'm still growing bored.

Diary: What is a regular day like for you?

WW: Hm let's see. I wake up and make sure my pet flying monkeys are fed. I look into my magic crystal ball to shop on Zappos. When I'm not shopping for the perfect pair of shoes, I am spying on all those who irk me on Oz. Namely that pathetic Wizard and the always annoying Glinda the Good. I really loathe her.

Diary: Why do you think only bad witches are ugly? What does that even mean? It sounds so cruel.

WW: Ha! It means that old goody Glinda has no clue how to throw any proper shade. I think I look fabulous. What do you think?

 

Diary: There's that menacing look again. I mean, yeah, I think you look awesome. You could say I'm just green with envy at your wicked cool looks.

WW: You are, as the Munchkins say, lame.

Diary: Anyways. What else are you up to?

WW: I am currently helping to map out this year's annual Convention of Evil.

Diary: Oh, that sounds like harmless fun! Tell me a little more!

 

WW: The Convention of Evil is a yearly event where the most evil beings in the universe converge to discuss the important topics of the time, like Defeating Your Enemies Once and For All or Marketing the Perfect Villain Figure.

Diary: Wow. I had no idea!

WW: And you hopefully won't remember any of this either. We can't have the annoying do-gooders of the world ruin our convention!

Diary: No need to use any poppy products on me. I'll keep your secret safe. Is there anyone you are looking forward to seeing at the convention?

WW: Oh yes. There is this one master of evil I enjoy spending time with. He's a real Lord of Destruction. I just have a thing for guys with blue skin.

 

Diary: So let's talk some personal stuff. I've always wondered something, what do you do if it starts raining?

WW: Huh?

Diary: Like, what if you are flying around on your broom, and it just starts raining? I mean, what do you do?

WW: I have a wide brimmed hat that can act as an umbrella.

Diary: What about when you need to drink something? Do you ever get thirsty?

WW: Due to my slight issues with liquids, I hardly require thirst. And when I do, it is only in painful baby sips.

Diary: But what if you need to pee? I mean, not to be grody, but does it burn when you pee? I had a friend once who had an issue with it burning when she had to number one. She wasn't a green witch though.

WW: What was the matter with her?

Diary: Well, turns out it was just a UTI she got while hooking up with a guy in a jacuzzi during Spring Break.

WW: That is disgusting.

Diary: I know right!? Jacuzzi hook ups are never a good idea. I warned her. Nobody listens to the pale dorky girl though. That's why I've never participated in an MTV Spring Break. Or really any Spring Break for that matter. I typically would just watch my soaps and read books during Spring Break.

WW: You are strange, and you ramble too much. 

 

Diary: I get that every now and then. Can I ask you another question? It is one I have always wondered about...

WW: That depends. Does it deal with bodily functions?

Diary: No. I promise.

WW: Alright. Well out with it.

Diary: Does it ever get lonely?

WW: What do you mean?

Diary: Like, being the Wicked Witch of the West, all alone in a tower with nothing but Flying Monkeys and Winkie Guards. I can't imagine that they'd be great company. And you no longer have your sister, who I'd imagine had been a nice confidant. Do you ever wish that things had turned out different with your life?

WW: (Taking time to answer) Maybe on certain occasions I think about what my life would have been like had I made other choices. But it is of no use. I am who I am. I refuse to change the fiber of my very being. I am the Wicked Witch of the West! Everyone should fear me!

Diary: (Looking sad) I suppose so. I mean, you are the Bodacious Baddie for March. I've also always sort of looked up to you, though I could never really tell you why. But I feel like you understand though, where I'm coming from. It really sucks to be hated. Or to have a house just fall out of no where messing everything up; your plans... your hopes...

WW: (With a glassy look in her eyes) Bah! I don't need anyone to look up to me! I've never needed that. Be gone Dorkette! I am done with you!

Diary: That's it? Don't you have anything else to say? I'm featuring you as the March Bodacious Baddie! I've got villains pissed that they are still on the waiting list for the next three months! Surely you have something to say about that, about any of it...

 

During this moment in the interview the Wicked Witch of the West howls out her trademark cackle before hastily riding off on her broom. In an instant she is gone. But while flying off into the air, the Wicked Witch uses an inky black smoke to spell across the sky:

Thank you

 

Two simple words that begin to fade away into the clear sky. Miss M looks for any other traces of the Wicked Witch, but she is truly gone. With that, Miss M ends the interview and walks back towards her damaged car from the tornado deposit, asking herself, "How am I going to get back home now?"

 

March 2013 Bodacious Baddie: The Wicked Witch of the West

 

Whew! What an interview! Enjoy the new Bodacious Baddie for March everyone! And in just a few days it will be time for an all new She-Ra Saturday! (Do a little happy dance!) The newest chapter will have a very defining moment for Mermista! Don't miss it. Take care everyone!

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

February 2013 Bodacious Baddie!

Oh what a whirlwind month this has been! I've just been a jet setting busy bee with my kick ass April O'Neil interviewing powers seeing me travel to the dreary Church Headquarters to talk with Popeful Pope Pinion, and I traveled to sunny Los Angeles to catch up with Jem. But now my journey is seeing me travel to a truly terrifying locale: Snake Mountain. That's right folks, I opened a space portal via my archival room and travelled across time and space to arrive on Eternia. He-Man and She-Ra both warned me against doing this, but I've never really been one for paying attention...

February 2013 Bodacious Baddie

Diary of a Dorkette: (looking around the dank confines of Snake Mountain) So Skeletor, I must say, I love what you have done with the place!
Skeletor: Yes well, ever since He-Man got the chance to get special upgrades and renovations to Grayskull, I thought I'd make Snake Mountain all new and menacingly fresh.

Diary: Hey, wait a minute, it still looks the same...
Skeletor: Quiet you! I don't need some female dork telling me about Snake Mountain!
Diary: Ok. I was just being observant... So you have been one of the most iconic villains of the past 30 years, what do you attribute to that dubious distinction?
Skeletor: Simple: my face. Or lack thereof.
Diary: Your face?

Skeletor: Must I explain everything to you? Nothing says bad ass villain like a skull for a face. Go ahead, ask anybody around and they'll tell you the same thing. A skull-face equals bad ass villain.

Diary: And here I thought you'd say it was your assortment of Evil Warriors.
Skeletor: Bah! I'd probably get the job done much faster if they weren't around.
Diary: Now that can't be true. You keep some pretty terrifying company.

Skeletor: I sure do, don't I? But make no mistake, I'm the true threat.
Diary: Does it ever get boring battling He-Man all the time and never quite making it out on top?
Skeletor: Oh that miserable He-Man is a fool. I am the one who controls my fate! He-Man only thinks he walks away the victor. I walk away on purpose, biding my time for a better plan...
Diary: Well I guess that makes sense.
Skeletor: Of course it does! Why wouldn't it? Don't you know anything about being a so-called bodacious baddie? You'd make a terrible Evil Warrior Miss M. Just terrible.

Diary: I will have you know, I could totally rock the shit out of being an Evil Warrior.
Skeletor: Oh really? Tell me something evil that you have ever done in your pathetic life!
Diary: Fine! Sure thing. Um. Well I once stole a Love-a-Lot Care Bear from this snotty girl in my pre-school class.
Skeletor: (horrified) A Care Bear? Yuck!
Diary: Yeah, I totally took it from her without her knowing! She was crying and everything once it was time for her to go home.
Skeletor: What did you do with the Care Bear? Rip its head off? Feed it to a pet monster?
Diary: Well, um, no... not really. I actually felt really bad and gave it back to her before she left.
Skeletor: You gave it back?! Hardly an act of a true villain. You are sad. And you hurt my eye sockets.

Diary: Ya know, I didn't come all this way to be treated like crap. You could be slightly nice to me. I am featuring you as the February 2013 Bodacious Baddie! That carries a lot of prestige!
Skeletor: Will it get me into Castle Grayskull?
Diary: I don't think so...
Skeletor: Oh you annoying wretched muscle-less version of She-Ra. This is the last time I have Trap Jaw book my appointments.
Diary: Ok let's shift gears. You mentioned pet monster earlier. I seem to recall hearing about a certain Manchine puppy named Relay that tugged on your heartstrings. Did you ever end up getting a pet of your own?
Skeletor: I do not know of any Manchine puppy. You must be making something up. (Skeletor fidgets uncomfortably.) I do not own any pets. I do not like pets.
Diary: What about Panthor? Isn't he sort of like a pet?
Skeletor: Ha! Panthor! He is a beast I use to travel across Eternia. Together we stomp out those infernal so-called Masters of the Universe. He is hardly a pet.
Diary: What do you feed Panthor?
Skeletor: Spare body parts here and there. He loves snake.
Diary: Oh. That sounds slightly grody.

Skeletor: Do you think I should have a pet?
Diary: I don't know. I'm just trying to make small talk.
Skeletor: Fine! Alright. I'll tell you the truth. I do own a pet. Ever since that bumbling stone face Hordak found his pet Imp, I have tried to find a suitable creature to help me out in times of need.

Diary: Wow, that is some dragon.
Skeletor: Yes, he is. I've trained him well. Not only does he play fetch superbly, he also makes a great weapon too. I can't wait to show off his abilities on my next round with He-Man. I have a feeling Grayskull will finally be mine!

Diary: (whispering) Don't hold your breath...
Skeletor: I heard that! You know something Miss M, I have a bone to pick with you.
Diary: I feel like that is the start of a bad joke.
Skeletor: Quiet! There's a reason why I wanted you here at Snake Mountain. You thought this was a mere interview for your boring blog, but no! I brought you here because I am angry!
Diary: Angry? At me? What for?
Skeletor: What for? I'll tell you what for! Does Adora's Search for Honor mean anything to you?
Diary: My She-Ra fan fiction? I didn't realize Snake Mountain got Internet service. What's wrong with my fan fiction story?
Skeletor: It sucks! You have done a bang up job portraying me! I am livid. I read those miserable chapters weekend after weekend, and I want to just scream with so much evil at you!
Diary: But why? What is wrong with it?
Skeletor: Where should I begin? You have me running around constantly losing. You have even managed to soften me up by putting me in some convoluted bizarre love triangle with Evil-Lyn and Shadow Weaver! You've managed to put me in a soapy melodrama titled with not He-Man's name nor the Masters of the Universe, but with Adora's name! Adora!? You have me in some second rate piece of fan fiction entitled Adora's Search for Honor. Where's the love? Huh Miss M? Where's the love? How 'bout calling it Skeletor's Appetite for Destruction! I like the sound of that.

Diary: Um, that would be a no. Besides, I happen to think you are portrayed rather well in this story.
Skeletor: I wish I'd never heard of it. If it hadn't been for my Evil Warriors being so addicted... my goodness they all wait on the edge of their seats for each new chapter! I've never seen such a thing! No wonder I can't get into Grayskull. This is all your fault Miss M. Had it not been for your miserable stories, I would have already taken over Castle Grayskull by now. I'm sure of it.
Diary: I am terribly sorry to hear that. Of course, the Evil Warriors will be glad to know, this She-Ra Saturday will mark the 50th Chapter, and it hopefully won't disappoint.
Skeletor: Ha. You think the 50th Chapter will debut this weekend? Come now Miss M, do you really think I'm going to let you leave Snake Mountain so that you can carry out your atrocious fan fiction on the universe? I think not! (At this point, Skeletor prepares a freeze spell to immobilize miss M.)

Diary: (Slightly nervous, Miss M points off in the distance) Oh look! Is that Frank Langella?
Skeletor: (Quickly turning around in excited fan boy charm) Wait, where!?
Diary: (Rushing off in a hurry) Gotta go!

...and while Skeletor was left to pick up the pieces of his shattered fan boy dreams, Miss M ran as fast as she could back to her portal to Earth. Upon arriving home, Miss M had a few missed calls from her mentor April O'Neil inquiring about the interview. Miss M wasn't sure what to say, but one thing was for certain, she had a chapter to write! So stick here, She-Ra Saturday is coming up with an all new chapter of Adora's Search for Honor!

January 2013 Bodacious Baddie

Why should the heroes of the world have all the fun? What about those vile and venomous doers of evil? Do they ever get a parade? No. They're lucky if they get their name somewhere in the opening credits on a featured animated series. So since I am trying to be the pillar of truth and fun for everyone, I have decided that Diary of a Dorkette will brave the scariest and most dastardly of places to bring you all the in-depth and hard hitting interviews with the world's most dangerous (and bodacious) baddies around!

To get this year started, I wanted to talk with someone that has been pretty elusive. This bodacious baddie doesn't just sit down with anyone. In fact I had to actually wait awhile (a good number of months) as he was in a deep sleep replenishing his energies. Once he was up and out of his sarcophagus we were both finally ready for one interesting interview! So ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Mumm-Ra, the January 2013 Bodacious Baddie.

January 2013 Bodacious Baddie

 

 

Diary of a Dorkette: So tell me, how long do you have to go into the sarcophagus stasis?
Mumm-Ra: It depends on how much energy I have used. This previous year was a very busy one for me. I was on a hit television show, you may have heard of it: the ThunderCats reboot! After filming the first season I just found myself to be entirely exhausted, I've been sleeping since.
Diary: Yes, I could understand. You certainly brought a lot to the small screen. Does it ever tire you though, that you never seem to win against Lion-O and the ThunderCats?
Mumm-Ra: What sort of question is that little girl? I am Mumm-Ra! I do not lose. I merely escape and plan my next attack.
Diary: Well surely with all that occurred once the season was done taping, you must have new plans of some sort going forward?
Mumm-Ra: I do not understand this question. You are not a very good reporter, what are your credentials again?
Diary: I can assure you I am just fine at what I do. I graduated from the April O'Neil University of Sound and Responsible Journalism. April taught me all I needed to know. I learned from the best.

Mumm-Ra: Well Miss Dorkette, if you knew anything, you would know to ask me questions about spoiler specific items. Like what to expect from the second season of ThunderCats! The reboot was one of the best new shows of the 2011-2012 television season!
Diary: Oh my. You don't know do you?
Mumm-Ra: Stop with these pathetic mind games strange dorky girl, speak what you mean to say.
Diary: Well Mumm-Ra... I guess you were sleeping in that sarcophagus for a little too long, because... umm... I don't know how to say this...
Mumm-Ra: Spit it out you infernal little wretch!
Diary: There isn't going to be a new season of ThunderCats! A second season of the reboot was never green lit.
Mumm-Ra: That is impossible! How dare you call yourself a graduate of the April O'Neil University of Sound and Responsible Journalism! You are nothing but a brat full of lies!
Diary: No! I am being honest. Didn't anyone tell you?
Mumm-Ra: My assistant henchmen know not to disturb my very important sleep.
Diary: Well don't you find it odd that you never received a script for a new season? I mean it is not like they would have recasted you. It is January, shooting would have begun months ago.
Mumm-Ra: That sort of makes sense. I know how I will solve this. Let me find my iCoffin.

Mumm-Ra: I just love my new iCoffin. It has a camera, touch screen, and everything.
Diary: You don't strike me as someone who would care much for technology.
Mumm-Ra: This might be true. Not all of us get the chance to own the Sword of Omens and require nothing else in this life. My iCoffin means the world to me. My granddaughter introduced me to this new high-tech item. She is full of attitude, but she keeps me informed.
Diary: Sounds like a very nice granddaughter.

Mumm-Ra: Yes. Yes, she is. She attends a high school for monsters and even got her friends to watch the show. I know she'll be honest with me. (At this point in the interview Mumm-Ra walked off to the side in hushed whispers.) Cleo! Yes, I am finally awake. I need to ask you something... (During this portion, Diary of a Dorkette could not make out the conversation between Mumm-Ra and his granddaughter, but towards the end it got really bad.)

Mumm-Ra: What!? It can't be! This can't be!
Diary: Are you ok?
Mumm-Ra: What do you think? My hit television show is not coming back! ThunderCats is over! How did this happen? Didn't anyone try to stop this?
Diary: Well many people joined together and signed petitions. Twitter got involved in a big way.
Mumm-Ra: Twitter? Is that an Avistan? I've never heard of him.
Diary: No...
Mumm-Ra: It is no difference. My world is ruined. And for that I am angry! Very angry! (At this point the room became very still and a swirling mass of electrical energy swirled around Mumm-Ra.)

Mumm-Ra: Ancient spirits of evil, transform this decayed form to Mumm-Ra, the Ever-Living!
Diary: Oh shit...

Mumm-Ra: Who is responsible for the cancellation of the ThunderCats reboot?
Diary: I am not entirely sure. Unfortunately I believe that the ratings just weren't that great, not to mention the merchandise warmed the pegs a little bit too much...
Mumm-Ra: You insipid woman, what do you mean?
Diary: I mean you can go to any toy section in most any store and find ThunderCats items on clearance. The line is over, it is gone.

Mumm-Ra: Tell me who. Tell me who is left? Are there nothing but Lion-Os and Tygras for sale still? Surely no one wanted that ridiculous Cheetara, she must be all over the clearance bins...
Diary: To be honest, because April O'Neil taught me well, the only ThunderCats figure I've seen in the dusty old clearance bins... is you.
Mumm-Ra: Bite your tongue! Go ahead! Bite your tongue! How dare you insult the supreme power of Mumm-Ra!
Diary: I wish I could tell you different. But it is the truth.
Mumm-Ra: I could ring your neck...

Diary: Please don't. I like my neck just the way it is. How about we change the subject? Surely with the popularity that the ThunderCats saw last year, there must have been some exciting things you got to experience?
Mumm-Ra: Aside from starring in a hit show? I can't really think of anything else. I mean I built an army. I had a nice catch-up lunch with MonStar. We discussed old times. That was nice. I also did some modeling.

Diary: Wow, you did have a busy year. So what are you going to do next? What is the plan for your 2013?
Mumm-Ra: I do not know. I suppose I will try to continue my quest to rule Third Earth. But I will more than likely continue to audition for new roles. After all, I am an actor of the highest caliber!

Diary: Right. Well Mumm-Ra, what else?
Mumm-Ra: I just want eternal youth and power. I am Ever-Living! I want the rest of the world to see how much power and success I have!
Diary: You should maybe think about joining the cast of a Real Housewives show. That might end up being your niche.
Mumm-Ra: I do not know what you are speaking of strange dorkette.
Diary: I think I'm about done. Do you have any thoughts about being the first Bodacious Baddie of 2013?

Mumm-Ra: Eh. I would have preferred this odd title last year when I was on the highly successful ThunderCats reboot. But I suppose this will do. If worse comes to worst, I'll simply just go to sleep in my sarcophagus until the next reboot.

And that was the end. Mumm-Ra called off the rest of the interview and refused to speak to anyone. Calls were made for a follow up, but Diary of a Dorkette could not secure any further contact. When pressed just enough, one of Mumm-Ra's assistant henchmen sent a statement detailing that Mumm-Ra had retired for the time being and would one day return to spread darkness around the world via the Ancient Spirits of Evil. Mumm-Ra insisted on being quoted as saying, "Wherever evil exists, Mumm-Ra lives! My legend will truly live on, even though the show didn't." Tear. (Mine, not his.)

The January 2013 Bodacious Baddie bows out, but who will be the next Bodacious Baddie? There is only one way to find out, check back next month! Also, stick around as we all find out the big reveal of the January 2013 Heroic Hottie! (Look for your pulse to race at the start of the week!)

Up next though will be She-Ra Saturday as Adora's Search for Honor comes back with an all new chapter. You don't want to miss it! And to get She-Ra Saturday going, check out my little look on Netossa. Take care everyone!