All My Toys: 331

Previously on All My Toys: Miss M was arrested and settling in nicely in her jail cell. Her parents, Big Boy Caprice and Cruella de Vil made the decision to do the right thing, whatever that might mean. This series of unfortunate circumstance were brought on courtesy of the Brow and Flattop. Elsewhere in Toy Valley, there's been a simmering story about barrels of toxic waste being stolen and smuggled out of town. But why? The story unfolds with the next All My Toys!

Toy Valley. Police station. Now.

Miss M: So... umm... I'm curious.

Trash: (groans) Just get on with it already.

Miss M: Well. Are you sure you're in the right place? Like, maybe they meant to send you to the morgue instead of here?

Trash: The hell kinda thing is that to ask someone? Do I look like I belong in a morgue?

Miss M: I mean...

Trash: I'm talkin to you ain't I? With words. Can dead people do that? Ha. The morgue. Ha. A morgue would be more of a party than this dull joint with you. 

Miss M: (shrugs) You just look like you've been through some things is all.

Trash: Honey, we've all been through some things this year haven't we? Besides, what lame little thing did you do to end up here? Run off from paying whoever did that prissy princess hair of yours?

Miss M: I do my own hair.

Trash: I can tell. 

Miss M: Why are you here? 

Trash: You ever do a strip tease on a gravestone?

Miss M: I can't say that I have.

Trash: That's because you aren't living. I do know how to live.

Miss M: What does that have to do with being in jail?

Trash: I'm gettin there! What? You got somewhere to be?

Miss M: Hey, no need to point your severed arm at me. I'm just asking a question. 

Trash: Ya know for future reference, if Mayor Grody ever asks you to party with him, say no. That guy is trouble. Me and my friends, we got caught up in some bad stuff. All this toxic waste talk you've been hearin about in the news, it's bad stuff. Melts the flesh right off.

Trash: Now I look like this, so I was ready to get mine. That damn mayor owes me an arm and a leg! But no, the moment you try to go and collect, all of a sudden it's breaking and entering. The world is too soft. So what happened to you pretty princess?

Miss M: I was hiding out my parents. They were both wanted. 

Trash: No shit? You could'a fooled me.

Miss M: Yeah. And my boyfriend is the detective on the case, so he arrested me and everything.

Trash: Wow. You're not as lame as I thought.

Miss M: Oh, I'm still lame. Trust me.

Across town, the Cheers bar.

Trish Manlis: You fools! Ridiculous fools! Everything has fallen apart thanks to you two!

The Brow: Trish, we only thought...

Trish Manlis: Only thought?! You both knew where he was. And you both knew what I wanted! Big Boy! Not dead. Or arrested. But delivered. To me! And now that miserable mutt is on the run.

Flattop: Our plan backfired, what else can we say?

 

Trish Manlis: You can start by telling me why it was such a brilliant idea to alert the police! I want them having no part in this.

The Brow: (lies) Of course Trish. (shrugs) We just figured Big Boy would turn to help if he felt the pressure of the cops on him, ya know? He'd get weak and turn to us. Make it a little easier to lure him to ya. 

Flattop: What else was we supposed to do? He was shacked up with his old ball and chain at their kid's place. We could'a made things messy, but figured clean hands would prevail and all. (smirks)

Trish Manlis: You realize this stunt makes me look weak don't you? I've been demanding Big Boy be brought to me, and instead the police are called. His daughter is arrested. And there's no Big Boy. He's gone. Poof. Making an example out of him is my path to success with this territory. So you two big funky headed fools better make it right. 

Trish Manlis: (turns away) Now the both of you; get out of my sight. And don't come back if there's no Big Boy. 

The two mobsters turn with grins, their plan beginning to show signs of progress.

Back in jail...

Trash: So wait, you mean to tell me, your daddy is Big Boy Caprice? The dude that owns that night club?

Miss M: Before it burned down. But yes.

Trash: And you're momma is Cruella de Vil, the fashion designer? 

Miss M: Yes.

Trash: No offense, but how did two cool people end up with such a dweeb for a daughter?

Miss M: (shrugs) I haven't the foggiest idea. 

Trash: Aww, cheer up. You just need to come out with my friends and I for a night. We'll get you to ditch all that pink and buzz off some of that hair. Get ya a push up bra and some cha cha heels. Have you ever thought about accessorizing yourself with a gash or puncture wound to your side? That'd make you kinda cool.

April O'Neil: She doesn't need that stuff, she's cool in her own way.

Miss M: April?!

Miss M: What are you doing here?!

April O'Neil: Oh you know. New York was getting a little boring. Unlike Toy Valley. I heard you got arrested. 

Miss M: Yeah, it's been a crazy few months.

Trash: Hey! You're that chick from the news! 

April O'Neil: And you look like a life well lived. 

Trash: Do you think you could sign one of my bones? 

April O'Neil: Umm, what happened to you?

Trash: Oh you know. Partying where I had no business partying. Some toxic gas and acid rain later and ta da! I'm a real party girl now with all kinds of fun tricks. Wanna see?

April O'Neil: Umm, no, but hold that thought because I might want to talk more with you about the toxic gas.

April O'Neil: M, there's something going on around here.

Miss M: Yeah. A lot. You've been gone awhile, but it's been crazy.

April O'Neil: I've been trying to catch up. What do you know about the toxic waste that was under your dad's club?

Miss M: Not much. He was pretty mum about all of that.

April O'Neil: Ok, what about the mysterious slime guy running around town? The one who has been hijacking the illegal transportation of toxic waste?

Miss M: I guess I heard about that on the news, but don't really know much.

April O'Neil: It doesn't ring any bells?

Miss M: (pauses) Oh. Like from that semester when we went to school at Troma High?

April O'Neil: Yes. I think this slime guy is Toxie. And if I'm right, that means something really bad is happening here. 

Trash: Hey! I know Toxie. 

April O'Neil: Excuse me, you do?

Trash: Yeah. I sure do. Carries a mop of justice or something. One ugly S.O.B. 

April O'Neil: Ok, I really will need to interview you.

Trash: Haha. I don't think so chick. You start messin with what's happening in the underworld around here, it'll be lights out for all of us, and I have more partyin to do. 

Miss M: If Toxie is back, that must mean...

April O'Neil: Yeah. Dr. Killemoff. Smogula. All this toxic waste mess, it must be connected.

Miss M: Wait. I'm having a moment. A memory. I was rescued in the fire at my dad's club. I don't know why I haven't been putting this together, but I think Toxie saved me.

April O'Neil: Are you sure?

Miss M: Possibly. It's fuzzy, that night, but I do remember someone carrying me out of the fire. I can't be certain, but in my heart I believe it was Toxie. April, what's going on in this town?

April: I don't know, but I plan on finding out. I'll be back.

Miss M: Ok!

Miss M: That's my former best friend. I think our friendship might be on the repair track! Gosh I could go for some seven layer dip with a bonus secret eighth layer in all this excitement.

Trash: What's the eighth layer?

Miss M: Umm, it's kind of a secret. I don't know that I should spill my guts. No offense.

Trash: Chick! If you don't tell me right now I'll eat your brains.

Miss M: Ok, ok! It's real simple. The secret layer is taco seasoned ground meat of your choice. And than you place some seven layer dip on top and just relish a taste of heaven. With chips.

Trash: That's it? Seriously? Ok, I'm eating your brains now.

Dick Tracy's office.

Elisa Maza: Ok Tracy, time has gone on long enough. I've got Bruce Wayne's lawyers hounding the station and getting judges involved, we can't keep your girlfriend locked up. 

Dick Tracy: Wrong. She's a flight risk. And bail will not be set.

Elisa Maza: Look, I think it's real sweet what you're trying to do. You know she could be in danger, so having her viewed as a flight risk means she can stay in a nice protective cell right under your feet, but you and I both know she is not a flight risk. And honestly, we don't want her. We want her parents.

Dick Tracy: M might not be a flight risk on her own accord. But she very well could be a flight risk if her parents kidnap her and take her away. That cell is the safest place for her. It might be what brings her parents to justice.

Elisa Maza: I think you're a little too hopeful on this Tracy. Big Boy Caprice and Cruella de Vil will not willingly turn themselves in. That's not in their nature.

Big Boy Caprice: Don't be so sure dame.

Elisa Maza: Well I'll be damned.

Dick Tracy: What is this?

Big Boy Caprice: Detective Dick, this is your lucky day.

Big Boy Caprice: Two criminals for the price of one. Or I should say, for the freedom of one. I want my daughter released.

Dick Tracy: You don't get to make that call.

Cruella: Oh what a prick.

Dick Tracy: Hey now. 

Cruella: What? You claim to love my daughter, and yet you treat her like this?

Dick Tracy: Your daughter committed a crime. I know you are not speaking up to defend her after you tried to kill her.

Cruella: (shrugs) That was the past.

Elisa Maza: Some past.

Big Boy Caprice: Look, we're here alright? Ready to confess to everything. So you gonna arrest us or not?

The bar.

The Tramp: Trish, I got some news.

Trish Manlis: I don't care about the latest on the louse that is Luthor.

The Tramp: No, no. This is some news you'll want to hear. We got a location on Big Boy. He turned himself in to the police.

Trish Manlis: (grins) Is that so? Who do we know at the station? Find out and bring everyone together. I want Big Boy, and I'll do anything to make that happen. 

Dun dun duuunn!

Up Next! Jail House Rock!