Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Toy Chest Tuesday! Moore Action Collectibles!

Ok things are about to get real. Real dorky. Like beyond dorky. I can't actually believe that I am about to "go there" with this week's Toy Chest Tuesday. So, let me set the stage for you, oh faithful reader. It was 1997. I was deep in high school and very awkward. Mostly friendless, I was obsessed with pop culture. I had long bleached hair because I wanted nothing more than to look like Gwen Stefani. (With my big old glasses, I was totally looking just like her.)

Anyways, I was also highly invested in writing the biggest piece of hot mess fan fiction my dorky little heart could come up with. Writing this fan fiction was how I spent my nights and weekends. I also say "hot mess" fan fiction because it was a mash up of everything I loved: X-Men, Final Fantasy 7, She-Ra, ThunderCats, Street Fighter, and He-Man. There were also other franchises too, but we don't have all day. I told you it was a hot mess. I don't know what it was, but I just thought that it would make sense to imagine writing a story where all my favorite characters lived in the same world. It was like dorky dreams meeting Knots Landing and Melrose Place.

The inspiration for these crazy fan fiction storylines was also based on my ever growing action figure collection. In fact having certain action figures would help inspire a certain story or romance. And yes, I take full dorkette responsibility in admitting that I may have played with my toys in acting out all these soapy tales.

Anyways, at one point I started to realize that I wanted some really cool female characters that would be complicated and mix things up in my stories. Enter Moore Action Collectibles. Oh goodness. I really can't believe I am sharing this.

So Chaos! Comics creator Brian Pulido had crafted many interesting female characters with his comic brand and though I had never really read those comics, I had found myself somewhat interested in the action figures by Clayburn Moore. Now I realize I was clearly not the target demographic for these figures what with their floatation-device chests and barely-there clothing, but the sculpting was so cool. These toys looked evil and looked like they had just walked off the comic pages! And they just seemed like perfect additions to my mangled mashed-up fanfic. So taking a trip to my then mom-and-pop comic store, I grabbed up the series consisting of Purgatori, Lady Demon, Lady Death, and Evil Ernie. So let's check out some pictures and rather sad stories about the Fatal Four!


Basically the original concept for Purgatori in the comics was that she was an Egyptian slave who became a deadly vampire goddess with a hate for her arch-enemy Lady Death. Her figure actually had some wonderful detailing. She also originally came with wings, but I removed them. I thought they were cumbersome and made her look bulky. She also came with a stand and weapon, as did all the figures in this line. However I have misplaced them through the years. The weapons got in the way of all the storytelling I needed to do.

Now her real story sounds lovely, but I had other plans for her. In my hugely tacky fanfic, Purgatori started out as a villain of the X-Men and cast of Final Fantasy 7. Her starting point involved a saucy Misery-style story on a deserted island. She tricked Vincent, from FF7, into falling in love with her on a deserted island after he tried to kill himself by jumping off a yacht. Once he was done with her games, they both traveled back to his home and she proceeded to cause problems with the other characters. She had a huge rivalry with Psylocke. They would both at one point or another cause injuries to each other that would leave them paralyzed at different times. One thing that would unite them into a friendship would be their fight to survive a maniacal plastic surgeon named Dr. Fred Craven. (He was a blend of Wes Craven and Freddy Krueger.) He was the reason she lost her wings.

Other adversaries for Purgatori would typically be other female characters.  I was clearly trying to work out personal issues with real life friends, so Purgatori was constantly fighting against some woman and it was usually over a man. For some reason I wrote Purgatori as a character that could never have children, probably due to the whole vampire thing, but she would always be nice to kids. Like there was a storyline where she was involved with Lion-O and they were going to raise WilyKit and WilyKat together. (In my universe Lion-O and Cheetara had the ThunderKittens together but could never make a relationship work.) Purgatori was ready to have a family and be a good vampire goddess, until Cheetara found a way to ruin her happiness by saying that Tygra was actually the father of the ThunderKittens. Hot mess.

The best plot involved her and Ryu. I wrote them has this epic romance that was shattered when he had a one night stand with Chun Li. Chun Li of course got pregnant and Purgatori ended up kidnapping the fresh newborn and hand delivering the baby to Akuma, whereby Akuma would raise the cherub as a deadly ninja. Eventually Purgatori would find love and happiness with Smasher, from Fighting Force. (Last week's Toy Chest!) Also, fans of Adora's Search For Honor might be interested to know that Purgatori was one of the characters that gave me the idea for Vampra!

Evil Ernie

I don't really know why I had to purchase Evil Ernie. The only thing I can think of was that I wanted the whole set. Anyways, the original Evil Ernie was like this zombie teen monster that was in love with Lady Death. The figure was completely creepy and gross, and I still don't know exactly why I wanted him, but I knew just the perfect place for him in my youthful fanfic.

Instead of being in love with Lady Death, I had him stalking Purgatori. I had written him as someone from her past that both loved and hated her, and actually committed all these crimes pinning them on Purgatori. There was this whole trial where Purgatori was going to be sentenced to death, but Magneto somehow found proof that Evil Ernie and a shape shifting Mystique were framing Purgatori. Mystique hated Purgatori because of the slight romance between Purgatori and Magneto. (The characters all got around.)

Anyways, Evil Ernie made one last play to kill his crush, but Purgatori and Sephiroth ended up killing him. Since he was already technically dead, he would eventually come back trying to kill her until he sort of gave up, because according to my old high school fanfic journals, he kind of just went away. On a side note, one of my high school fan fiction journals was a giant Melrose Place notebook!

Oh my goodness, I can just see the followers fading away after this.

Lady Demon

I never truly understood the concept of Lady Demon, except that she was essentially a darker more evil version of Lady Death. So when I purchased this figure I knew I wanted to create a complicated character that I could use to explore my thoughts on the world.

There were some similarities to my take on her in the fanfic and her role in the Chaos! Comic. She hated Purgatori with a passion and she would always have this struggle with being evil and maintaining some goodness. However things took a big turn to the left when she developed torrid love affairs with Zangief, Blanka, the Juggernaut, J. Jonah Jameson, and Man-At-Arms.

So she stole Zangief from Purgatori but then fell for the damaged Blanka. They then found themselves in a very strange relationship. He lost his temper and became abusive, and at first she kept excusing his actions until she had enough and tried to kill him. But then they both found out that M. Bison was using some mind control powder on Blanka. After that was resolved, Blanka tried to atone for his actions, but their love was never the same.

Then Lady Demon carried on a strange romance with J. Jonah Jameson and even wanted to become a reporter. She ended up finding out that Peter Parker was Spiderman, and then she started blackmailing him. Once Peter Parker stopped doing her bidding, Lady Demon wrote a tell-all in the paper about his identity as Spiderman. Mary Jane was pissed and got into a big cat fight with her. It was just messy. She also found love with the Juggernaut, but I wrote her soul mate as being Man-At-Arms. Her story would end tragically and it would involve Lady Death...

Lady Death

Now Lady Death was a big deal. Even though I never read the comics, I do remember her presence being felt and that she had this whole bad girl persona that was a trademark of 90's comics. I loved that the figure came with a cloth cape. Often times I feel like it seems like a dumb idea to give plastic figures cloth details, but I think it can work.

Since Lady Death was the epitome of bad girl 90's behavior, I knew I was going to have to give her a really appropriate introduction into the world of tacky teen girl fanfic. So Ryu was looking for love online and started a cyber-romance with what he thought was a sweet girl ninja. The sweet girl ninja was actually Lady Death and she was purposely stalking him to pay him back for spurning her years ago. So the real life date happens, and when Ryu finds out who he has been talking with this whole time, they fight each other nearly dying in the process.

Eventually she would move on from her hate on Ryu because she would always be trying to ruin the lives of Purgatori and Lady Demon. She short circuited a would-be romance with Wolverine and Purgatori. She also teamed up with Blanka to destroy Lady Demon before Blanka could realize he was under a mind controlling substance by M. Bison.

Earth and Eternia practically collided when MOTU became a part of the fanfic. Lady Death and Lady Demon both were connected to Eternia though neither knew why. Lady Death rekindled a deadly romance with Skeletor and even had a very intricate sex scene with Ram Man while she was in a prison behind bars. Oh my goodness, I had too much free time as a teen.

Anyways, Lady Death and Lady Demon both would be involved in tragic endings. As the story unfolded on Eternia, both Death and Demon would find that there was a whole chunk of their pasts that they could not remember. Lady Demon would be the first to find out that she had once been a sorceress and would have to go through these holy trials to cleanse all the evil from her and regain her memories. Lady Demon succeeded and remembered her whole life and her love for Man-At-Arms. She would also find out that Lady Death was her sister.

Upon learning of this, Lady Death wanted nothing more than to regain her memories too, so she went through the same holy trials. Once they were completed she ended up losing her mind and turned on her sister. And somehow I wrote this morbid ending where they end up killing each other! The fanfic went on, but that was about it. I wrote this strange and crazy fanfic from like the end of '97 to October 2003! I truly had no life. I started that story in high school and kept writing well into my twenties. Oh goodness.

But I still have the toys. Though they may be a departure from the things that I was normally interested in, I do have very fond memories of the Moore Action Collectibles. I would also go crazy over the Witchblade items, though those may show up at a later time.

I actually hope this Toy Chest Tuesday was not some terrifying post. I truly am a sane and normal-ish human being. So did anyone actually read Chaos! Comics? Were there an fans of Lady Death or Purgatori? Has anyone else written mash up fanfics involving really random and kooky pairings? Feel free to comment and let me know. I hope you are all doing well, and keep it here! I've got more great stuff coming up.


  1. Oh that is awesome.

    You are so twisted.

    1. You say twisted and I just say lame. Very very lame. That is the only word I can use to describe my mess. lol

  2. I have 3 of the Witchblade Figures by Moore. The Medieval Witchblade double I have is yours for free if you want it. Just email me with your addy. I already have one and you would appreciate it and give it a good home, I think. I will send you the pictures. Or just post them on my site.

    1. Oh thank you so much for thinking of me Kal! I would indeed give any toy a very good home due to my neurotic tendencies, but I already have that Medieval Witchblade figure. I will email you though just to make sure I am thinking of the same figure though!

    2. Hey Kal, I am slow. I can't figure out where your email is at. Could you email me? missmermista@gmail.com

  3. In the late 90s toys were very sexy....and scary lol.

  4. I still have to read last Saturday's search for honor chapter! I had a big presentation this week so I had to put all things dorky on the back burner.
    Right about the time in this where you said J.Jonah Jameson and Man at Arms and Ryu were all in the same story this became the funniest post ever.
    See now, if you did video posts, this one would have been very funny to include the big vaudeville hook coming out and grabbing you. In the middle of reading your hilarious Lady Death Masters of the Universe X-Men, Street Fighter etc. fan-fic from your Melrose Place notebook and the hook just yanks you off.
    "..and then -Magneto and Blanka get into a fight over Cheetarah because they both think she is a clone of Jem who they are both in love with and.."(yoink)"wait! hold on I'm not dooone!" ( M vanishes off camera ensnared by the hook)

    I never read Chaos comics. I think my demon girl Sateena is much cuter and has a better character design than these demon chicks.

    1. Well I hope your presentation went well! And I really hope that people get a laugh out of this post. Because the idea of putting all those different characters together is just funny. And crazy. The video idea would be hilarious.

      And I do like your Sateena design. She is certainly cute with a lot of fun thrown in. I like her. I also keep checking your blog, I can't wait for any new stuff!